From one Evil to the Next
by Woman of looks and substance
Summary: Harry was left at the Dursleys to be made weak and easy to manipulate. That plan backfired look out world for a dark evil Harry that is going to make Voldemort look like a a nursery teacher. Dark manipulative Harry! Slight Ron Hermione Molly Ginny and Dumbles bashing. Harry/Daphne Draco/Astoria. An inspirational story to warm your hearts.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Privet Drive, November 1st 1992

Dumbledore POV

The self-proclaimed leader of the light should have been devastated by the brutal murder of Lily and James Potter but actually he was a very happy man. You see there was a prophesy made that involved the Potter`s brat and a certain dark wizard. The prophesy stated that this boy could do what he himself could not and defeat Lord Voldemort. Dumbledore already had an idea on how to implement his plan. First he convinced Sirius Black that Peter Pettigrew would make a more reasonable secret keeper for the Potters, he didn't even need to curse him to give the Potter location away. As much as Dumbledore liked Lily and James they had to die and leave Harry an orphan to be raised by his abusive relatives who would make him really weak and easy to manipulate. Naturally Dumbledore would use his position in the government to make sure Sirius did not receive a trial. Sirius was to raise Harry should Lily and James die but that could not happen as Harry would be far too independent under Sirius he needed a loser in life someone with no self confidence. No, instead Sirius would be framed and sent to Azkaban so he could not influence the weapon (Harry). None of this bothered Dumbledore as it was for the greater good. "The prophesy seems to be going according to plan for the greater good". While Dumbledore was not happy that he would lose the Potter wealth backing his operations it was for the greater good which meant he too would have to make a sacrifice. Now the second part of his operation was to go into effect that being condemning the brat to hell on earth for the next ten years. If all went to plan Dumbledore would have a really weak unconfident and easily malleable boy or as he liked to refer to Harry as his new weapon. Perhaps before Harry died he could have a few rounds with him.

Minerva McGonagall was very reluctant to leave Harry with these poor excuses for people. But Albus had told her and Hagrid that they were wonderful people and that they would take care of young Harry to the best of their abilities. Dumbledore's assurance was enough for both of them as he was never wrong or so they thought. " We have no business here" Dumbledore said as they took their leave. Hopefully they refrain from beating him until he is at least three, thought Dumbledore but it was not troublesome enough for him to go back for as he had a date with Gellert to go to at Nurmengard. That night was the starting point in one of the most bizarre rises to evil in the annals of British history.

8 years later

Harry Potter had a disturbing dream last night it involved his parents being killed by an ugly man with no nose. The man who looked like plastic surgery gone wrong had said some words Avada Kedavra or something like that and they were dead. Harry was beginning to think that was the real cause of death for his parents not a car crash. You see Harry Potter could tell if someone was lying to him and he did not like it. It was like magic he thought, sitting in his room. It all seemed to make since to Harry now because he had been doing unusual things for a while now. The first thing he had ever done was while running from Dudley and his gang he had managed to somehow turn invisible and was able to escape. The next was when his Uncle Vernon had tried beating him for outperforming Dudley in all classes , while Vernon was punching him his skin would turn to a burnt crisp, needless to say Vernon never touched him again and resorted to crude insults. Petunia and Dudley were now afraid of him and Harry used it to his advantage to get anything he wanted he was quite a manipulative child. Today was a new day and today Harry would get answers.

"Aunt Petunia" asked Harry from over the book he was reading invoking a small scream from his aunt, " Tell me about what really happened to my parents and no lies"! Aunt Petunia for fear for her life began to tell the tale she wished she would never have to but she had no choice. As Harry listened intently to his aunt tell about being jealous for not having magic as her sister did Harry suddenly realized why his aunt never liked him. While she told him the story he slowly began cutting off Vernon's fingers with a razor. The story of the murder was not to disturbing because he knew it already, no the thing that got him was this Dumbledore had the nerve to put him here of all places instead of a magical family. Harry knew from the way his Aunt talked he was famous in this magical community surely a family would take him in. Harry was good at deciphering intentions and knew he was to be manipulated. Now the world was in for a surprise manipulation of their own. "Aunt Petunia take me to this Diagon Alley you speak of" Aunt Petunia hurried up for fear of her life as she looked at Vernon moaning over his bleeding stumps of fingers. While Vernon moaned Harry focused his efforts and soon Vernon had regrown his beloved fingers. Harry chuckled and warned Vernon not to mess with him anymore.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

As Aunt Petunia hastily scrambled to grab her car keys, Harry was contemplating the new world that he was momentarily going to enter. Finally Harry had arrived outside of a shady bar called the Leaky Cauldron in downtown London. Aunt Petunia proceeded to explain that only wizards like himself could see it therefore it was hidden from muggles as she described herself. "Well I will be back for you in four hours" said Aunt Petunia obviously in a hurry to leave, but Harry was not going to let her off that easily, wait how about some money or I might scream" Harry knew Petunia loved people to think her to be normal and screaming would not do ,so she gave him 100 pounds and told him to exchange it at the bank Gringotts. Soon Harry met Tom the barman and proceded to enter the wizarding world for the first time.

Harry could not believe his eyes all around him colorful stores of every kind selling so many bizarre items he could not believe it. While it was impressive it seemed to lack a certain something maybe it was too juvenile. Harry was wondering around with a cautious eye until he stumbled upon a sign that read Knockturn Alley, with a quick look down he saw it was dark and had hooded figures stalking its grimy streets, Finally what I have been looking for, Harry thought with excitement seeping his body. The storefronts contained skulls and severed fingers among other objects that would cause the other 9 year olds in his muggle class to have nightmares for weeks, but to Harry this was truly a fascinating place. He entered a store called Borgin and Burkes and was just about to buy a cursed necklace to give to his math teacher who constantly tried to bully him when he realized he forgot to visit the bank called Gringotts Petunia had told him about. "Well ,well, well, who ever thought to see the great Harry Potter in Knockturn alley and alone no less" came a drawl from a blond haired man previously hidden in the shadows. "What The Harry Potter" asked Borgin with a panicked face. "Obviously" Harry answered in a bored voice to the surprise of the two men. The blonde man stepped forward "forgive me mister Potter but I am just surprised to see Dumbledore's golden boy in here at age nine I am Lucius Malfoy by the way." "Well I am pleased to meet you Mr. Malfoy but what was that you said about Dumbledore?" "oh you know Dumbledore has been regularly updating the world about your close relatioonship with him while you are happy in the care of your realatives and that you will soon be ready to join our world" Harry could feel his anger rising "I have never even met him, in fact I did not even know about magic until two hours ago I am naïve on the subject of magic but I don't have to be familiar to know that Dumbldore is a manipulating bastard" Harry spat. To say Lucius was shocked would be an understatement, there might be hope for him after all thought Lucius with a smirk. "Mr. Potter it appears a great injustice has occurred and it would be my pleasure to make it right you and my son Draco are to go to Hogwarts in two years and I would like to offer to teach you all you need to know about magic, but to do this we must "convince your realatives to let you study with me because know doubt Dumbledore would know if that muggle hovel was no longer your home, think of my home as a bording school what do you say?" "Sounds good" Harry replied who couldn't wait to study with this Malfoy. "by the way what were you ntrying to buy the necklase for?" "well I intended to give it to a rather rude muggleteacher" Harry replied. Lucius liked this kid already as he paid for the necklase.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Lucius Malfoy was not what you could consider a gentle man but around Harry you could easily be fooled into thinking he was. Young Harry was like a second son to him and Narcissa. Harry and Draco were closer than any brothers could possibly be. When Harry first arrived at the Malfoy residence he and Draco were involved in several fights but all was soon resolved after Harry drew life was good, and today the Malfoys would be doing something they never thought they would be doing they were going to adopt Harry. Lucius used his connection with Cornelius Fudge to make the transfer of custody without a certain bearded wizard from knowing. Lucius submitted some of Harrys more violent Dursley memories to sway the minister. He made it a point to remind the minister that this is the happy home Dumbledore says Harry was in for years. Lucius prided himself on driving a wedge between the minister and the Headmaster. "Yes Dumbledore is to remain ignorant of the adoption it will be a cloed adoption the less he has to do with the boy the better."

Three days later the adoption was final and Harry was a Malfoy and he would be addressed as Harry Potter what a surprise Dumbledore was in for when Harry arrived at Hogwarts. While Draco and Harry were practicing quiddich as they both were looking to try out for the house team Harry as seeker and Draco as chaser, Narcissa approached them with a worried look. "Boys your father and I would like to see you in the blue room", shrugging Harry and Draco discarded there brooms to give to Dobby to polish and they arrived in the blue room. Upon seeing them Lucius began his sales pitch "Boys when I was your age I met your mother at what they called a marriage seminar it takes the best high families sons and daughters to meet each other and begin a marriage contract I daresay at the end of the week you shall have found your future wives to continue our family line". Harry and Draco both grinned they may have been ten but they already liked girls and couldn't wait.

The seminar was in the Malfoy manor ballroom and everybody dressed formally. Harry had met several girls but wanted to take his time Pancy was nice but not marriage material maybe a friend though. Draco had similar luck until they saw them black hair and ice blue eyes sisters standing at the edge of the room. It was destiny. Daphne and Astoria Greengrass


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

A/N Please tell me if you like it.

September 1st 1998

Harry and Draco were exited to begin their careers at Hogwarts in two hours' time. They had already made plans to sit with their friends Pancy and Tracy on the train. Harry and his fiancé Daphne were anxious that they would be separated by house but Draco had reassuring words, "like you two could be anywhere but Slytherin" Draco appeared a little down perhaps due to the fact that his fiancé Astoria would not be starting Hogwarts for another two years. The group of Harry, Draco, Pansy, Tracy, Daphne, and eventually Astoria would in there minds do all to undermine that muggle loving fool Dumbledore. Lucius had tutored Harry on the evil of muggles, but after living with the Dursleys Harry couldn't agree more. Lucius had bought Harry an undetectable wand to practice dark magic on muggles for his birthday. Dumbledore would be in for a surprise.

Dumbledore was a sharp subject for Harry for he appeared to be unaware of his adoption he still was using his influence to manipulate his life it had brought him back to a week before when Harry had visited the wand shop. The stupid wandmaker had tried to force a holly and phoenix wand on him, Harry may have bought it too after hearing it shared the same score as such a noble wizard like Voldemort but upon hearing it came from Dumbledore's phoenix he lost intrest. Eventually Harry went to Knockturn Alley and had a custom made wand made out of diamond with a core of human heart string for a fun effect. Harry was not looking forward to being praised as the boy who lived because he believed Voldemort to be a noble man with a great mission. Harry could not stand anyone saying he was light or a muggle lover. Voldemort would have to be eliminated because he was a rival in the way of his goals but first he would deal with Dumbledore. But that was years away first he had to get to Kingscross. With one last look around his room and grabbing Daphne's hand Harry and the Malfoys set off for Platform nine and three-quarters.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

A/N All of the previous chapters including this are just a brief summary the ones after this are going to be longer.

Fred and George Weasley were the two most troublesome students at Hogwarts since the marauders themselves so they could tell if something was being plotted for why else would their headmaster be at the Burrow several hours before they were set to go to the train station. Even odder yet was the fact that he asked to speak with mum , Ron , and Ginny. Luckily for the curiosity of the twins they had already developed a crude set of their future extendable ears.

Dumbledore eyes twinkled merrily as he addressed the three Weasleys, "Today Harry will likely not know where the platform is and it is your duty to help him along therefore earning his trust for he will jump at the chance for a happy family to accept him." Ron Weasley sat there with a grin on his face, he had been tasked with the job of being Harry Potter`s best friend and if what Dumbledore had told him was correct he would me more than willing to give him money. Dumbledore began again "As I recently checked Harry has not accessed his account at Gringotts which makes me wonder if I should have sent Hagrid to the Dursleys to help him, we may find out that Harry has not even bought his school supplies yet, but if he hasn't I am sure we can loan him some robes and he will be even more grateful and loyal." Dumbledore gave Ron the procedure find Harry on the train and say everywhere else is full and befriend him. Ginny meanwhile was so excited Dumbledore had promised her that he would make a love potion for Harry to fall in love with her when she started Hogwarts next year. Dumbledore went on to explain that he needed Harry to have a wife who was loyal to the light and there was nobody better, Molly Weasley was already making plans for the wedding. If all went well Dumbledore would have Potter`s loyalty and fortune it was for the Greater Good. He never knew a certain pair of twins head everything.

Before Dumbledore left he gave Ronald a quick kiss on the lips. "My future husband coming to Hogwats at last" he sighed.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

A/N Thanks for the reviews.

Arriving just on time to Kingscross Harry, Daphne , and Draco along with Narcissa said their goodbyes and Narcissa went to join Lucius for a luncheon with Minister Fudge. Before going onto the platform Harry noticed that dumpy Weasley woman and her clan of children. "Now what`s the platform number", Molly was yelling even though her children were right next to her. "Honestly woman this place is packed full of muggles there a thing called secrecy" said Harry coldly while Draco glared at the woman in disgust. "Its you Harry I am Molly Weasley I was just talking so you could hear and we could help you on the platform." "Well I obviously don`t need your help you filthy blood traitor but I am sure all these muggles know how to get on now", said Harry with disgust. "Harry that is no way to speak to someone, but I see you are hanging out with a Malfoy so I will forgive it", said Molly with a shrug. The two kids that remained suddenly stepped forward, " I'm Ronald but you can call me Ron were going to be best friends in Gryffindor, and for Christmas I want the Nimbus 2000", then the little girl stepped up " I`m Ginerva but call me Ginny and I'm going to be your girlfriend and future wife" Ginny then turned to Molly "Mum can I kiss him now oh please" Molly gave her youngest an encouraging smile, "Yes go ahead but don't take too long as the tain leaves in three minutes pucker up Harry dear." Harry who watched with a stunned face as these smelly people acted as if they owned him put up his hand and said in a very dangerous voice "First off I don't know you people, second of all I don't know what that jerk of a headmaster has told you but you don't own me, and lastly I would rather kiss a dog for at least a dog has had its shots, besides I have a beautiful fiancé right hear" At that moment Daphne stepped forward, how the Weasleys missed her standing next to Draco he had no idea. "Your fiancé but Dumbledore will fix this you will be with Ginny like you belong" "That idiot Dumbledore has no say in my life besides how could I even think about that ugly little girl next to Daphne?" Smack, and Harry had a broken nose wrong move. "Help this stranger has hit me", Harry screamed. A woman police officer tackled a flabbergasted Molly Weasley and was handcuffing her when the trio left to get on the platform. Before Molly was carted away he stunned the police and looked down at Molly taking out his bloved box cutter he removed the idiots lips and dipped them in sugar for a snack.

On the train ride Harry and his group comprised of Daphne ,Draco, Pansy, Tracy, Crabbe, and Goyle sat and discussed plans for when they got into Hogwarts and the subjects they would be studying. They had only a few interuptions one in the form of a round faced boy named Neville Longbottom and a mudblood named Granger. The mudblood had been so annoying talking about how she had read every book and was going to outperform all the purebloods to show that blood didn't matter, upon hearing this Harry took out his new diamond and human heartstring wand and banished he out of the compartment. The next interruption was Ronald who said all the compartments were full before telling the rest of the group to leave as Harry and him were best mates. "You see, Ronald said looking at Malfoy some families are better than others that's where I can help you and all I would ask in return is the Nimbus 2000." " Yes Ronald some family members are better than others" said a pair of voices. "I'm Fred and this is George" said the first twin before banishing Ron and and removing his hair. The group had now added two more honorary members as they made it to Hogsmeade. For the duration of the trip Fred and George made it clear that they hated the rest of their family members. Harry and Draco then joked at Ronalds bald head soon thry noticed the train slow down. They had arrived.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

As Harry and his fellow first year mates sailed to the castle on the boats they couldn't help but sneer at Granger as she recited the entire history of Hogwarts to students that really were not listening. Finally they made it to the castle where they were treated to a stern lecture by the deputy headmistress. Finally, they proceeded into the great hall Harry waved at the Weasley twins who were sitting at the Gryffindor table. The sorting hat the moment it began to sing his song intrigued Harry as it was obviously a supremely powerful magical object. Soon the song was over and it was time to sort. "All we do is put on a hat I thought we had to wrestle a troll" said Ronald. McGonagall took out the scroll "Abbott Hannah" Hufflepuff, and so on. Harry gave Daphne's hand a reassuring squeeze after Granger was sorted to Gryffindor. The hat didn't take long with Daphne before it sorted her into Slytherin, Harry clapped loudly. Daphne gave a happy grin and joined Tracy soon followed by Draco and Pansy. Now the moment we have been waiting for Potter Harry.

Harry made his way to the chair as he noticed everyone including Dumbledore sit up a little straighter. McGonagall smiled when the hat was given to him no doubt thinking that he would be sorted into her house. Soon the hat was upon him." Hmm quite the talented one are you", said the hat smartly. "You remind me of a Shakespeare quote from Macbeth something along the lines of the snake beneath the flower". "You will be in Slytherin don't worry, but before I make this startling announcement I will give you a little advice on your path to greatness as I too hate the muggle lover of a headmaster and want to see the muggles in their place so listen, first inside that little scar of yours is a soul fragment called a horcrux created by moldyshorts it is one of eight, he cannot be killed until all are gone one resides in his body. Next to ensure you rule the world and are unopposed you must obtain the Deathly Hollows the three hollows are the unbeatable Elder Wand currently in Dumbledore's possession you have to take it forcibly from him to gain its allegiance. Next is the resurrection stone and the cloak of invisibility that's all for now and you should work on obtaining the Hallows and horcruxes during your seven years now goodbye" SLYTHERIN, the hat yelled to a shocked hall. Harry slowly made his way to the table with a grin on his face as he saw the devastated look upon Dumbledore's face no doubt shattered that his plans were momentarily ruined. He received a thumbs up from Snape whom Harry had already met during his time at the Malfoys as he was Draco's god father. He gave a single fingered solute to a betrayed looking Ronald while the twins smiled good naturedly and shook their heads. Harry enjoyed talking with his fellow house mates even the older ones respected him. When the feast was over Dumbledore gave his stupid speech before he announced "Harry Potter please report to my office" It was a furious looking McGonagall who lead harry to the office and gave the password and soon Harry was left alone with Dumbledore. Dumbledore looked at Harry over his glasses and said "Well my boy how do you like Hogwarts so far?" " Its ok" said Harry with a shrug. "I will put you in Gryffindor where you belong with your friend Ronald" said Dumbledore. "No thank you Slytherin is the house for me and Ronald is not my friend" said Harry coldly. "Harry he is your friend and I will not tolerate back talk you will respect your future brother in law. I am your guardian and I say it is Gryffindor for you or I will kick you ass. Now where did you get money when you accounts have not been touched" "My parents by stuff for me and my fiancée Daphne does not have a brother named Ronald" "Your parents died Harry and I arranged for you to marry Ginny as she is of the light not the darkness and for thinking you could go against my wishes you must sleep with me tonight no clothes and no arguments" said Dumbledore impatiently "Wrong I was adopted by the Malfoys and Daphne is my betrothed and also incedently you are a sick bastard I hope you know I recorded this all including your "punishment" " Harry told Dumbledore showing him the proof before he fainted. Harry would not be tattling just yet. Looking around Harry grabbed the wand "Ill be taking this" the wand shot out sparks ready to serve a new master at last.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

A/N Please review

Simply saying Albus Dumbledore was mad would be a huge understatement his carefully crafted plans involving Harry Potter had backfired he was independent in Slytherin and worst yet being raised by the Malfoys without his knowledge. He had to remain at his relatives home so he would be able to manipulate him. Dumbledore thought perhaps he should try the your parents would be disappointed in you speech with him but he had a feeling it would not work. If all of this was not enough it appeared he had lost his wand when he fainted , he didn't believe Harry would have stolen it as very few people knew of the hollows. The hollows that reminded him he still had Potter's invisibility cloak but after Harry not listening to him today he would instead give it to Ronald to spy on Harry. He had to keep tabs on Harry as it was for the greater good. Dumbledore did have the sense to check his entire office for his wand. No he will simply try to get in Harry's good graces and see if he accidently picked up the wand. After having Severus fetch him he asked ,"So Harry I hope you have reconsidered changing houses" asked Dumbledore pleasantly. "No sir I love Slytherin my whole family has been in it" said Harry. "Yes about you family they are not your real family and I am working to have you removed as Lucius worked for the man that took your real parents" said Dumbledore. "Just because the Malfoys are not my birth parents doesn't make them not my real parents and I will fight you if you remove me I am not a pawn in your game as Minister Fudge knows all about your treachery" said Harry coldly. "I am sorry you feel that way but when I last called you here I lost my wand would you have per chance seen it?" asked Dumbledore. "No" said Harry flatly, aware that Dumbledore didn't believe him. "Why would I steal a piece of wood that old when I have this" said Harry taking out his diamond masterpiece. "Harry you were destined for a Holly and phoenix wand I beg of you to send an order for it is imperative" said Dumbledore urgently. "I already know its Voldemorts brother wand and as much as I admire him I wont use anything from your phoenix" said Harry Dumbledore collapsed again upon hearing Harry admired Voldemort Harry took this as his cue to leave.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Disclaimer I don't own Harry Potter

A/N Please review or even better criticize something please

Harry and his friends first week of school was very enjoyable as they seemed to sail through their classes and were able to pick up bonus points for Slytherin due to answering all questions. Harry and his friends favorite class was potions as they all had a personal friendship with said thatDumbledore had asked him to be rather harsh with him no doubt wanting Harry to seek the old headmaster out for guidance and drive a wedge between Harry and the rest of Slytherin House but Snape assured Harry that he would not be manipulated by the old coot and that he would assist Harry and his friends in bringing him down. Snape also told Harry that he and his mother had been friends a t Hogwarts. During their first potions lesson with Gryffindor they decided that Ronald Weasley would be the entertainment. Question after question Snape drilled Ron with Harry answering all the questions. "You shouldn't know that Dumbledore is already disappointed in you, you know too much and that is the mark of a dark wizard" said Ron. "Detention Weasley since you know nothing a suppose that makes you very light", said Snape with a smirk. After the class had ended Harry had racked up along with his friends two hundred points for Slytherin while Gryffindor lost two hundred.

Harry was just leaving the dungeons when he and his crew were met by the site of Fred and George who had a piece of paper in their hand and were seemingly looking for something. They proceded to explain how the map worked that it told what person was where. "you see we were looking for dear Ronald and here he is" said George grabbing at the air and pulling off an invisibility cloak. Ronald screamead and fled but not before the twins applied a charm to remove all of his hair for a week. "I wonder why he was spying on Harry but more importantly why does he have a cloak and one this good" said George Suddenly the cloak left his hand and landed in Harry's hand who immediately knew what it was he now had two hollows.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Harry's Revenge

Disclaimer I don't own hp

After coming to the conclusion that Ron was spying on Harry under the orders of Dumbledore Harry and his friends enlisted the help of Snape to get back at the old coot. "I say you set Weasley up challenge him to a wizards duel destroy him and modify his memories in fact I shall vouch for you" The next day it was set Harry would duel Ron with Draco and Seamus being the seconds. Harry would take this chance to make a statement to the old coot not to mess with him. Harry unlike poor Ronald would not be using simple firstie spell but some serius dark magic. "Be careful and have fun", Daphne had told him with a wicked grin and a wink.

Harry arrived with Draco to find the two already there. "I'm going to kick your arse Potter this ones for Gryffindor" said Ron proudly. "Lets get this over with" said Harry with a grin. The two faced each other and immediately Ron pelted spell after spell of jelly legs and tickle charms which Harry easily dodged. "I see you haven't got any aim I guess the stories are true that you sit everytime you use the bathroom to avoid spraying the celing" taunted Harry as he released his first and only spell "Sectemsempra" strait into Ronald's face which immediately was slashed. Draco then stunned Seamus and together modified their memories to reflect that it was a wand backfire. Chuckling the two left and alerted Snape to pick up the idiots. Snape applauded their handiwork as he taught them that spell as it was his own personal creation.

Dumbledore explained the events over breakfast the next day but said Ron would recover after his accident but his face would be permanently scarred. Harry sent flowers and taunted Granger "I hope your boyfriend Weasley isn't too ugly" they sneered. Even Fred and George who hated Ron laughed. It was good to be Harry Potter.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Disclaimer I don't own Harry Potter

A/N Do you like it so far. Any ideas for Ronald.

As Albus Dumbledore paced his study his mind was in a flurry over the events that had unfolded. Despite seeing the memory of Ronald's wand backfire he knew Potter had something to do with it. It also confirmed his worst fears that Harry was turning dark. Perhaps he should have checked up on him at the Dursleys and maybe he would not have joined Lucius. It ticked Dumbledore off that Potter had not only not accepted Ron's friendship but disfigured him. Dumbledore had new ways to make Potter fall back under his controle one was to allow him on the quiddich team as a first year and the next he would drop hints about the sorcerers stone to make him retrieve it where Dumbledore would be waiting to save him from Quirrel/Voldemort. That also reminded him that it appeared Snape had not taken his orders to treat the boy badly as Snape appeared to be his favorite teacher. As Dumbledore was being serviced by Grindelwald he also came to the conclusion Harry had stolen the elder wand and he resolved that after Harry was back on track and had defeated Voldemort that he would have to kill him as it was for the greater good. Now for the time being he had to make due with the holly and phoenix creation that was supposed to be Harry's.

Harry enjoyed his first month in school as he and Daphne got closer as it was important to get to know the person you would be spending the rest of your life with. Daphne was the perfect girl for himas she respected animals but hated muggles as much as he did. Harry would have Dobby bring some muggles for the group of Slytherins to practice dark arts on. Harry had shown the group the elder wand and said that he would be working on finding a way to duplicate its power onto everyones wand in the group. It turned out the way the runes were inscribed held the key to this puzzle but they all concluded it would be years until they succeeded. Meanwhile they had their first flying lesson the next afternoon which they were all looking forward too as they wanted to see Weasley again.

When they all got to the pitch they hardly listened to Madam Hooch but instead taunted Ronald who was turning redder by the minute. "Hey there Picasso I must say the scars brin out the red in your hair" Ronald then went flying straight at Daphne who sidestepped him and was about to hex him when Harry held her back while Ron was being scolded by Hooch. "I think we can get him back in a better way" he winked as pointed to the big troll like Millicent Bulstrode who was trying not to look at Ron but failed she obviously had a thing for scarred faces. "Remember the permenant love potion Snape made us take the vaccine for that would make the drinker fall I love forever with the person" Harry asked while Daphne got a devilish grin.

That night as Ronald wolfed down endless amounts of food he started to feel funny as he was leaving the great hall he saw her the most beautiful girl with her brown hair and wart covered lips and she spoke to him. "Hey boyfriend" before consuming him in a deep kiss and the stories began of the Gryffindor and Slytherin first years who stayed all night in the broom cupboard.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

A/N I own nothing

Warning extreme violence

Halloween came and went for the Slytherin friends and life was fun the unfortunate happened when the mudblood Granger was killed during the Halloween feast by a troll due to Ronald taunting was not remorseful but seemed very jealous when Snape gave Draco, Daphne, and Harry all permission to join the quiddich team as first years. The ruling had brought up an uproar so professor Dumbledore forced Oliver Wood to add a first year. In fact a new rule had went up that allowed all first years to have a tryout. In the end Slytherin added a new seeker in Harry and two new chasers in Daphne and Draco. Gryffindor was forced to be content with Ronald as their new seeker despite having been outflown Dumbledore personally ordered him on the team much to the anger of the twins to "get his mind off of the loss of his friend", despite it being pointed out that Ronald was responsible for her death. The first mach of the season would be Gryffindor vs Slytherin and Ronald Weasley was already bragging that he would be the hero to as he said "put the snakes in there place" The friends merely sneered at his foolishness and ate their breakfast when the post owls arrived with a letter for Harry from Lucius. As Harry fed the owl and red the letter he frowned it appeared from the looks of the letter that Dumbledore had sent one of his men to the ministry to overturn the adoption and force a marriage contract with one Ginerva Weasley. Lucius said he could not be charged because he had not actually done anything only intended too. At that moment Harry smiled as he showed the letter to Daphne, and summoned his houself Dobby who appeared with a crack. "What can Dobby do for the great Harry" said Dobby eagerly "Fetch the man Dedalus Diggle he has attempted to cause major harm on me and he will be punished I will send a message to Dumbledore just leave him in the room of requirement and I shall deal with him" Harry's attention then turned to the task at hand they had a quiddich game to win.

On the cool crisp November day all the Gryffindor's were wearing bracelets that said Gryffindor Strong. The Slytherins just laughed and focused on the game which soon turned out to be a blowout Daphne easily got the quaffle past Wood as she would end her day with seventeen goals while Draco would add seven of his own. Finally Harry did the wonski feint and ended the mach as Ronald crashed by a score of 880-0. After a quick celebration it was time to go and deal with Diggle. Only Draco and Daphne joined Harry on his torture as the others were a little squeamish but would warm up with time. Arriving at the room of requirement they were happy to see it was a dungeon with Diggle shackled down he was already whimpering he reminded Harry of a whimp Lucius had told him about named Peter Pettigrew. "So Diggle your man Dumbledore is not here to protect you so don't scream as it would be useless now we will give you a run down on what happening my lovely betrothed Daphne will be cutting out your gall blatter while Draco will remove your forarm you will not passout as the potions will prevent it. You will live long enough to see me remove your vital organs." After some fun the crew ate dinner as it turned out Diggle made a fantastic roast.

T


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

A/N I own nothing of hp

Please review

Dumbledore was a little concerned about the disappearance of Diggle but that was not important at that moment he had a far more pressing matter at hand and that was controlling Harry Potter. Ronald was still trying to befriend him and steer him to the light where he could be Dumbledore's pawn but he couldn't and instead would be permanently disfigured as a result. Dumbledore contacts at Gringotts had told him Harry had not withdrawn anything from his vault which meant that Dumbledore and the Weasleys could continue helping themselves to the fortune. Then Dumbledore thought he knew that Potter had stolen his wand but when he spied on him all he could gather was that diamond creation. He needed Harry back under his controle and the genius he was he had come up with the perfect way.

Molly Weasley was seeping with excitement at the moment and the pleasure of a job Dumbledore had given her after her arrest at Kings Cross he had helped her out and all he needed in return was this small task. The task was simple through a clever potion created by his brother Aberforth it would be drunken by Molly and the affect would be the first person she kisses would be under her control and when she took control she would force Potter to marry Ginny and transfer his fortune to her and be loyal to Dumbledore. As she thought all of this in the boys bathroom she didn't know that a young occlumens could hear her.

"Draco, Daphne", Harry whispered to his closest friends, "It appears Dumbledore's lust for power has no limits as he has little miss piglit in that bathroom to ambush me as she assumes that I will be the next person in their I think she will be in for a surprise" Daphne immediately got that evil grin on her face that Harry loved so much, "I seem to want to try out that new bladder filler charm that I read about it would be fascinating", she said tauntingly her eyes lingering on a Ronald Weasley who was trying to steal cat treats off of Mrs. Norris the boy would stop at nothing for food it seemed like it was time to exploit that weakness in something that was sure to make headlines throughout the school and Harry just happened to have a wizarding camera that world capture the scandal that was sure to unfold. "Draco what happened to my muffins" said Daphne pretending to not see that the bag was right beside her. "Lets go back to the common room maybe Goyle has them" said Draco in a mock concerned voice. As the two left and Harry was underneath his cloak camera at the ready he almost snorted out loud at Ronald's foolishness as he took one bite of the enchanted muffins and was immediately reliving himself Number 1 and Number 2 in his school clothes. As he took off to the bathroom there was immediate pandemonium.

Molly heard the footsteps as she knew Potter was just talking with his friends this was him and Dumbledore had told her to surprise him. "Come to mama", Molly screamed engulfing her son in a lingering twenty second French kiss before she realized that it was really actually her son! "Bloody hell more Mum" said Ronald with a grin as he relised he was the first of his year mates to kiss two girls even if it was his mother and the other Millicent Bulstrode. All Molly Weasley could do was weep.

The Slytherin friends plus the twins laughed at the Daily Prophet article the next day as it read "COME TO MAMA" , as its headline with a picture of the kiss seen around the world it went on to explain that Molly Weasley was arrested for incest and sent to Azkaban for two months with a fine of two hundred galleons. It also praised Professor Snape for stopping the madness for they were in a mens bathroom after all" Ron was the butt of many jokes contrary to the glory and reverence he assumed he would get for the incident. Dumbledore was left wondering if it was possible to do anything to the brat without it backfiring. It was good to be Harry Potter.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

A/N I don't own Harry Potter

Harry and his friends had an enjoyable next couple months and before they knew it, it was time to depart for Christmas holidays. Aboard the Hogwarts Express the friends spent their time contemplating their upcoming holiday as Daphne would be staying with Harry at Malfoy manor along with Tracy and Pansy , and then a surprise Fred and George who had the reluctant permission of Arthur Weasley to come seeing as he was in the middle of filing for divorce from Molly as she had brought shame upon House Weasley. It appeared Arthur had potential and after some talks he and Lucius had begun to be on the same side as it appeared his wife's betrayal had caused him to see the world in not so much of a positive manner and had been disgusted to think he had ever been fascinated by muggles and aligned with the manipulative Dumbledore. Fred and George were now no longer funny jokers as their pranks were now very dark and sinister.

As the crew got out at the train station they saw Molly Weasley who was marching straight at Harry. "Young man you have caused this family so much trouble come here with Ginny where you belong you will do as I say before someone gets hurt" Molly screeched in a threatening voice. Harry ignored her and walked over to Lucius when Molly grabbed Daphne by the arm and was about to hit her but before Harry was going to attack Molly a dark spell sailed over his head and hit Molly removing the skin fron her head including the hair line. Harry looked over to his and Draco's cousin. " Why thank you Hermione it is good to see you" Harry said gesturing to the Black heiress who was stolen at birth but had at last returned. "It appears a black cloud has been lifted Dumbledore imprisoned my dad but he won't harm anyone else its time we get daddy out of prison" said Hermione no longer the annoying bookworm. Steeping over the gruesome form of Molly Weasley the children and Malfoys altered the Weasley's memories and had Fred and George tell the aurours that it was a spell backfire intended for a muggle which would for that dark spell imprison Molly for life. Two hours later when Dumbledore read the report he fainted. Dumbledore would now have directly take Potter in by force no more games it was for the greater good.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

A/N I don't own Harry Potter

Please review

Harry and Draco smiled at Daphne as she looked shocked at seeing Hermione Granger alive and well but also with the Malfoy family. "Allow me to explain" said Hermione with a grin at Daphne's expression. "When Ronald was taunting me at school I went to the girls bathroom to cry but in my intense anger it was like a curtain had been removed and I suddenly remembered that I was not Hermione Granger but Hermione Black the daughter of Sirius Black and Emmalyn Vance. Draco and Harry found be crying and subdued me killing the troll in the process they removed me from the influence of the imperius curse which was designed to make me a spy. Draco and Harry then realized they had found the missing Black heir. I was stolen and sent to live with muggles presumably by Dumbledore after he framed father who was due to become your guardian Harry. Harry and I could have been siblings but instead he had Sirius sent to Azkaban Harry's parents killed and us sent to live with muggles to be his perfect tools only it is all backfiring now" Hermione said this all in one breath.

All of Harry's friends came around for Christmas and it wa wonderful as the onyl distraction would be that Molly Weasley after some strings being pulled by Dumbledore had been released from Azkaban but now was divorced and penniless. Arthur meanwhile became great friends with Lucius and distanced himself from Ginny and Ron who were still with Molly. During Christmas it appeared there would be romance as Fred and Tracy had announced that they were now betrothed along with Georg and Pansy. Life really was good.

Soon the friends along with a returning Hermione were back at Hogwarts where they were treated to being immediately summoned to the Headmasters office. After being invited in Dumbledore immediately began "So Mrs. Granger you have returned do you relies the pain you have caused Mr. Weasly by order of the Chief of the Wizangamot you will sign a marriage contract with him as he has told me he disires you. As for you Mr. Potter you will no longer be seeing Mrs. Greengrass or you will be expelled you will wait for lovely Ginny next year and in the meantime you will be resorted into Gryffindor" ordered Dumbledore with his wand raised. "I don't believe anybody has the right to set up marriage contracts or steal from my vaults or put people under the imperius curse and the sorting hat sorts students and only redoes it when requested by the student" said Harry as Hermione was instantly sorted to Slytherin. "And don't think we don't know how you had the Potter's killed and papa framed old man and we will be sending a copy of this memory along with the magical signature of the person that put me under the imperius curse to the DMLE" snarled Hermione as Dumbledore feinted. The group decided now was a great time to leave. But before doing so they decided to trash the headmaster's office. All about the office they saw pictures of Dumbledore standing proudly claiming that he would stop the one percent as he called it. The one percent was just the pure bloods whom Dumbledore actually only disliked because he could not con them into making love to him. So with a flourish of his wand the tables in the office broke apart ad the portrait of Dumbledore giving Filch a blowjob were thrown in the fireplace. Now they decided to leave. No sooner were they past the threshold when they were apprehended by Dumbledore but before he could do anything they banished him through the wall knocking him out and for good measure removed his beard before shoving him in the banishing cabinet as he would refuse to acknowledge for the sake of his pride that he had been attacked by first year students. Before they knew it they had arrived outside of the forbidden third floor corridor after a quick alohomra spell they were in front of a giant three headed dog but luckily Harry knew how to subdue it and began to sing "Rooster" by Alice in Chains while he and Hermione made it down the shoot. They soon burned all of the plant life and proceeded to summon the key. A chessboard was also there and soon they transfigured it into a pool and swan across and before they knew it they saw a troll, "Avada Kedavra" said Harry while Hermione smirked. The next room had a potion and it was easy to determine the right one. Finally they met Professor Quirell who was standing alone Hermione meanwhile inspected the mirror and got a blood red stone. "Give me that" said Quirell "Finders keepers" said Harry "Do you know who I am" said a voice in the back of Quirell's head "I am Lord Voldemort" "oh are you well in that case Avada Kedavra" said Harry as Quirell who was shocked at the turn of events collapsed and a whisp of vapor left screaming. " Lets go and get some lunch", yawned Hermione as she pocketed the stone. Little did they know they were being watched by Dumbledore's new boyfriend Tom the Inn Keeper of the leaky cauldron. "Very interesting my love" Dumbledore belched catching Tom in a warm sloppy kiss as the two made love on McGonagall's desk dampening all her ungraded assignments.


	16. Chapter 16

I don't own HP

To the reviewer who said Harry did not beat Dumbledore how do you think Grindlewald got the wand plus Harry shoved Dumbles and removed his beard.

Harry found out that due to Dumbledore's threat that she would be leaving Hogwarts and transferring to Durmstrang until Dumbledore was replaced. This strengthened Harry's resolve to remove the old coot for as he was becoming quite a problem. As soon as they returned to school they had many pranks planned and with the help of their allies it should be quite easy and the first on their list was surprisingly not Dumbledore but Ronald Weasly.

Ronald "Ron" Weasly was not a happy man the paper about the infamous kiss had not glorified him but instead made him the laughingstock of Hogwarts. At least Millicent stood by his side he thought with a grin. No he would have revenge on Harry Potter. And another love potion keyed to Ginny ought to do the trick. Molly Weasly was seething she had lost her husband and had become very scarred but getting the Potter fortune would definitely neutralize that. And her Ginny would be the one.

At the moment Harry entered Hogwarts to start the new term he was for once not sent to the headmasters office. But Harry was prepared for anything.

Dumbledore and Molly stood outside the Great Hall waiting for the events to unfold. Dumbledore had been busy over the break with the task of finding a new DADA teacher and trying to explain to Flamel that the stone was gone. So what if he was going to die it was for the greater good as was the task at hand today. Dumbledore you see had the task of having the house elves put love potion into Harry's food. It was keyed to Ginny and once under his control he would be resorted into Gryffindor and would be funding his operations what he did not know was that Harry knew how to tell if their was potion in his food.

Harry nudged Daphne when he detected his love potion laced food. With a simple switching spell the food was returned to Ronald Weasley at the Gryffindor table who was eating everything in site. Harry then began to play the part he took a bite and glided from the table in a dream like state before engulfing Daphne in a kiss. Dumbledore's expression turned from smug to anger as he grabbed Harry by the hair and marched Harry to Ginny to the shock of the students Snape was about to interfere when he was knocked aside by Ronald Weasly who flung himself at Ginny and kissed her the first thought in Ronalds head was that is my third girl kiss. He did not have time to think however as he was knocked out by Millicent who felt betrayed. Dumbledore feinted.

The next day Lucius was accompanied by Minister Fudge as he thundered into the headmasters office. "So you think you can just manhandle my son after you attempt and fail to ensnare him with love potions which by the way are illegal" snarled Lucius. Both Lucius and Fudge had seen the memory of what happened and were furious. "As the headmaster I am given the right to punish students so long as I don't do serious harm and the love potion you speak of I have no idea" said Dumbledore firmly "Funny you should mention Sirius I have recently interrogated him under Veriteserum and he tells me you not only knew he was innocent but I found out that you were also responsible for him not getting a trial well he had one and he is free" said Fudge "As the chief of the Wizangamot you cannot free him I did not approve it" said Dumbledore fiercely. "It is a shame that you put your authority over a mans freedom but don't worry I have officially removed you from your position of Chief Warlock and also I have replaced you with Dirk Creswell as our representative on the International Confederation of Wizards." said Fudge triumphantly "But Cornelius I was the head of the ICF therefore giving us much leeway" said Dumbledore afraid now of losing so much power. "I would rather have a first term representative who is honest than a chairman who is manipulative but I might as well tell you Peter Boggle of the U.S. is the new chairman but that is of little importance to you as you are no longer a member" said Fudge with a grin. "Now you have more time to do the job as you said is the most important one and that is Headmaster" said Malfoy with a predatory grin on his face. "How you have manipulated Harry's life is despicable and I am glad he found Lucius" said Fudge "Gentlemen as Headmaster I am going to ask you to leave" said Dumbledore going back to scheming how to get his positions back. "We may stay as he have the premission of the Vice Head to conduct this meeting. Do you honestly think I would let you remain in power seeing how it has corrupted you. You will remain headmaster in name only but the true power of Hogwarts resides in the Ministry and that is why I have appointed Dolores Umbridge as Vice headmistress as she shall be in charge of staff hiring's and the daily functions and curriculum you may have a say in her plans but ultimately the decision is hers as it is in correspondence with the ministry she can not be here today but she tells me she has big plans good night Albus" said Fudge as Dumbledore feinted.

The next day Harry was elated he and Daphne along with all of their fellow Slytherin friends had been named to the Ministry student task force who would be above prefects and Head boy and girls on the authority chain. They could dock points and award them as they pleased as well as award detentions. After talking to Fred and George Harry with the permission of Umbridge had transferred them into Slytherin as they believed they were brainwashed to go there. They became members of the quiddich team giving Slytherin the two best beaters in the history of Hogwarts and having Gryffindor scramble to pick up the pieces. Fred and George were elated to join a team where they would win the cup instead of pulling Ronalds weight. If you cant beat them join them was an appropriate thought in this situation. Slytherin who already dominant was able to fill their only weakness. It after an investigation by the department of Magical Sports supervised by Amelia Bone of the DLE with testimony by the Weasly twins that Dumbledore as headmaster had been interfering for years in the Quiddich team appointing members like Ronald to seeker despite his poor play and grades to the team. And unfair double standards as Dumbledore had dismissed every member who was below acceptable academically from their quiddich teams all except Gryffindor who of their five remaing starters only two were eligible Katie Bell and Oliver Wood. Angelina Johnson , Alicia Spinnett, and Ronald Weasly were ineligible to play. It appeared Madam Hooch had reported the grades to Dumbledore and he had failed to punish Gryffindor. In the forty years Dumbledore was headmaster Gryffindor had at least three ineligible players every year. In his forty years Gryffindor had won the quiddich cup twenty-one times and had racked up 87 wins. The department vacated all 87 victories and all 21 cups and removed the points from the house cup system which caused Gryffindor to lose twelve house cups the runner ups were awarded the quiddich and house cups in those years. The ruling meant Gryffindor had not officially won a single quiddich game in forty-one years and a house cup in twenty-seven years all records. Before Gryffindor was the winningest house in quiddich cups and house cups now they were last in quiddich and third in House cups just three ahead of Hufflepuff.

It was good to be Harry Potter


	17. Chapter 17

I don't own HP

Gryffindor Overhaul

By Rita Skeeter

Following the academic fraud revelations that rocked Gryffindor house which resulted in vacating every quiddich victory for the past four decades including 21 quiddich cups cumulating in 12 house cups needing rewarded Gryffindor house has now lost their two remaining eligible players Oliver Wood and Katie Bell. Early last night following investigation it was determined that neither Bell or Wood had anything to do with the dishonesty and after seeking ministry approval were cleared to have the once in a lifetime chance to transfer to a different House. Both Bell and Wood had a meeting first with Professor McGonagall the longstanding transfiguration teacher and head of Gryffindor house in which the stern professor tried to convince the pair to return to rebuild the team and boost the moral in Gryffindor. Then under the watchful eye of the Ministries own Dolores Umbridge the other three houses were allowed to make their offers. Bell ultimately joined Ravenclaw who already and became the third chaser on the team that had two great ones giving the claws one of the most formidable chaser trios in many years and be considered the team with the best shot to knock off Slytherin. Wood meanwhile said he was willing to rejoin Gryffindor if Bell returned but when she left for Ravenclaw he knew it was time to go ( after all who would want to play for a team who had not officially won a quiddich game in 40 years) Wood considered joining Bell in Ravenclaw but decided then Hufflepuff seeing a rare opportunity to strengthen their team offered Wood prefect status as well as the captain badge. Ravenclaw was unable to do this as Roger Davies was already the established captain. Wood decided to join Hufflepuff we here at the prophet wish them the best. Bell joins an already talented line up who will be challenging Slytherin right away for the cup. Wood meanwhile joins a team that's victories have been very few over the last ten years but Wood being the best Keeper at Hogwarts and a master strategist will keep Hufflepuff in the conversation. Wood and Bell's departure follows Fred and George Weasley who left for the team everyone is chasing Slytherin. The only question is what is next for Gryffindor?

The Slytherin team was exited at the prospect of facing the new and improved Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff Bell seemed to add a new dimension to an already good Ravenclaw and Wood was impressive. When the two faced off it was really an epic game Wood with his strategy was able to come up with a way to neutralize Ravenclaws offence for small periods of time but Ravenclaw proved to be too much and won despite Diggory catching the snitch Ravenclaw won 270-260. Despite losing Hufflepuff bounced back to win 760-140 over the newly assembled Gryffindor squad. Harry had to give them credit McGonagall had to name the longstanding commentator Lee Jordan as captain just for having seen a lot of quiddich and therefore having an idea about strategy he was now the seeker the rest of the team were a mixture of 5th years as he did want to have to replace anybody next year but rather grow into their positions. Harry had to give them credit the whole house had come out with loud chants off WE ARE GRYFFINDOR and they even briefly led but Wood was too smart and destroyed his old house. At 0-2 Gryffindor was out of the running and the record went to 0-3 as they fell to the claws 830-260. Slytherin then played Hufflepuff in an important game Wood had the right strategy and Hufflepuff came out swinging and led 60-10 before Flint called a time out the whole crowd wanted the upset and Hufflepuff was taking advantage of the long layoff Slytherin was on following the timeout Daphne scored three goals but then Hufflepuff scored two of their own to take their lead to 80-40. Draco it appeared could not get the right time and the layoff was paying its toll Fred and George seemed be struggling to understand the new strategy in Slytherin. Daphne to Harry's dismay was hit by a bludger and the score got worse from their 180-40 the crowd was roaring Slytherin the team that looked untoachable was 140 points down and that's when Harry decided to pull out all the stops finally a challenge he saw the snitch but so did Diggory but Harry soon swerved pushing Diggory aside to catch the snitch and steal victory from the jaws of defeat. Oliver Wood could only smile he had thrown everything he had at Slytherin but it wasn't enough. At least next year he would have a full year to access his teams strengths and weaknesses and mold the team in his image.

The party in the Slytherin common room sounded promising so that is where Harry and the mended Daphne intended to go when they were stopped by Dumbledore. "You must stop this madness Harry you cannot hide from your destiny and I will be the one to bring you back to the light" Dumbledore then shot ropes at Harry but Harry dodged them taking out his Diamond wand he sent a dark spell at Dumbledore who dodged it but upon seeing the dark magic feinted. Harry then conjured up a pair of sissors and clippers. He and Daphne then decided to have fun. Daphne gave him a Hitler mustache and Harry shaved him bald except for a small ponytail in the back. They then shoved him in the room of requirement that they recently found which took the shape of a prison. After wiping his memories Dumbledore would be released after two days.

TM


	18. Chapter 18

I don't own HP

Read and Review

Harry in his letters to Hermione updated her on the status of the quiddich team as Slytherin was taking on Ravenclaw for the cup two of the best teams in Hogwarts history. Harry told her that he would bribe the minister to further weaken Dumbledore with the gold he was using from the stone. He updated her on the studies and his disappointment that the ministry deemed it unnecessary to teach DADA. He then figured she would get a kick out of the clean shaven Dumbledore who would yell when ever Umbridge would come up behind him and smack his bald head and ask if he had a problem with hair. Eventually he made a hair regrowth potion.

The Ravenclaw-Slytherin game had developed more fanfare than any game ever in Hogwarts history and an illegal betting pool had started over it. Slytherin started as the favorite but now Ravenclaw had the edge as many assumed Ravenclaws experience would be the difference. Ravenclaw also had what was considered the best chaser trio in history led by Roger Davies, Katie Bell, and Mark Owen the trio had scored the most goals. Slytherin however was not far behind and by the time they all depart could be considered the greatest trio. Draco who was very good in the first game against Gryffindor was terrible against Hufflepuff missing all five of his attempts but he had been working extremely hard to improve as they needed all they could get to keep level with the high powered Ravenclaw attack. Harry was confident he could catch the snitch over Chang and was confident Slytherin would score often and early because despite Ravenclaws offense they were a little weak at Keeper. Fred and George finally figured out the new schemes in Slytherin and found that it fit their style of beater.

Ron Weasley was watching the teams heading out with extreme jealousy he should be out there leading Gryffindor to the cup it infuriated Ron that all the wins and cups had been vacated he could not understand as Gryffindor was the greatest house they did not have to do work right? He had talked to Johnson and Spinnet but they for some reason accepted the punishment and said they would return next season but from now on would put school work first madness in Ronald's opinion . Dumbledore had been tutoring him so he could be eligible to play therefore having a reason to be near Harry. Today he had been tasked with taking out Greengrass so Harry could marry Ginny pig. Despite it being against the law Ron was told to use the Avada Kedavra Dumbledore said if he was caught he would cover for him saying it was for the greater good. Ron saw the team coming and now was his chance but before he could do anything began to fart as Harry had seen what was happening and put a charm on Ronald that made him fart when the curse was about to happen the strength blew his pants off! Dumbledore had hired Ron to do it as he did not want associated with dark magic as it would ruin his reputation saw what happened and immediately feinted and was trampled by the stampede going to the quiddich pitch. He would feel it in the morning.

Soon enough Harry and Slytherin were off and immediately Daphne scored and soon Fred and George knocked Mark Owen into the stands but he recovered and came back to score past an unsuspecting Flint. Soon Slytherin had a 120-30 lead and Harry had to grin Daphne had four goals but Draco had redeemed himself with three of his own as much as was made about the greatness of Ravenclaw and their Chasers Slytherin's trio led by Greengrass, Malfoy, and Parkinson were outclassing them with breathtaking efficiency. Then soon enough he caught the snitch and they won 380-140. Slytherin had also won the House cup for a seventh straight time they finished with 1,041 points Ravenclaw was second with 880 points Hufflepuff was third with 657 points, and Gryffindor last thanks to Ronald with negative 3.

At the closing feast Dumbledore stood up to make the announcement "Now the house cup needs awarded Slytherin has the most points but that is not enough for the cup as we honor bravery above all else therefore Gryffindor wins" said Dumbledore triumphantly. "I have now seen your manipulation Slytherin wins. I thought when we revealed all of your manipulations you would stop favoring your old house but this goes to far Slytherin wins" Umbridge said sweetly. Minister Fudge then stood up "Dumbledore this has now caused your termination as headmaster" "Actually I am under contract that prevents firing" said Dumbledore wickedly. It was Lucius's turn to smirk "Actually you are wright you cannot be fired but moved to a different position the ministry is here to tell you that you have been moved to the post of muggle studies professor and Dolores is now the Headmistress, also sense we are discussing staff Lockhart will teach the new ministry approved DADA next year" Dumbledore was no longer Headmaster his last stand of power but instead teaching a stupid class like muggle studies he promptly feinted as the Slytherins cheered an Gryffindor cried the year was perfect.


	19. Chapter 19

I Don't own HP

After a summer of quiddich and practicing the dark arts Harry was ready to return at last. He and Daphne had spent a lot of time together and had become very advanced. They had visited Hermione and Sirius in Germany and she had told him how she loved the advanced dark arts curriculum at Durmstang and Harry had to admit he was jealous. But at least he was still a member of the quiddich team and ministry task force which would allow him to get away with everything. All of his books were bought the original booklist contained all of Lockharts books but after appealing to Umbridge she had forced him to refund every student who had bought it and forced him to teach the book to all years that Harry suggested which was a beginners guide to the Dark Arts the ministry was initially unwilling to approve the book but with the help of Lucius it was approved as to show students what not to do. Dumbledore was thunderstruck and had appealed the decision but he was after all the muggle studies professor and was soon advised to butt out of things that had nothing to do with him upon hearing this he feinted but no one payed him any attention.

It was an enjoyable train ride except for the fact that they were visited by Ronald Weasly. Millicent apparently had lost interest in him and had given him the antidote for the love potion and had wiped his memory. As Weasly entered he stopped upon seeing they were eating and attempted to steal their food. "You better give me that food and I just might take it easy on you at quiddich because I will be back because I now have the grades" said Ron happily. "You may have taken all of our wins but Dumbledore when he gets his power back will reinstate them along with the 21 quiddich cups" They ignored him and he got mad saying the headmaster would sort him out and lead him back to his destiny. "Oh you mean the Muggle Studies professor I thought everybody saw him demoted but I will make sure to tell the Headmistress about this" said Harry coldly

Dumbledore who was hiding under an invisibility charm choose this moment to come out "Potter not only have you decided to walk from your destiny you have crippled the leader of the light of my positions you forced me to do something I really did not want to do but it is for the Greater Good" said Dumbledore with a predatory gleam in his eye as he lifted his Holly and phoenix wand about to perform the imperious curse that would forse Harry to convince the ministry to give Dumbledore his power back that included all of his positions before transferring to Gryffindor from there he would marry Ginny and in doing so give Dumbledore the money he seeked but just as he was about to perform this Ronald who after eating sixty tuna and flounder salad sandwiches let off a legendary fart and Dumbledore upon smelling feinted. They then stunned Ronald and decided that they would not report this as they could give them haircuts and Dubledore would not be able to say anything without admitting he tried to attack them. They then shaved both of their heads with a charm that would not wear off for three days they then shined their heads so they could see their reflection Fred and George's idea of course. They then shoved them in the storage compartment it appeared they would be late to Hogwarts.

Upon arriving at Hogwarts Umbridge greeted them and the sorting began eventually a shiny bald Dumbledore and Ronald arrived. Ron immediately was infuriated to find out the feast was over and began trying to shoot spells at Filch for some reason in his anger. He was then marched out and forced to clean the hallway with Filch for three months. Umbridge then said "Do not be alarmed the bald man is the Muggle studies professor Dumbledore" "The light will rise again" said Dumbledore who stood on the staff table shooting curses at the Slytherin table. It appeared he had hit is head feinting one to many times. Umbridge was furious his unique contract prevented him from being fired so they put him in a meaningless job but yet he continued to try to get power. Harry sent a curse after Dumbledore aimed for Daphne it hit Dumbledore and caused his ear to fall off upon seeing this he feinted and was sent to the hospital wing to rest up for his first class as Muggle studies professor.


	20. Chapter 20

Dumbledore was furious he would force Harry to come to the light. Thankfully with his power his hair had regrown before he had his first muggle studies class. He had used the imperius curse on the house elves to put love potion in Potters food but it was just not working it seemed Ronald kept eating it and in turn kept falling in love with Ginny. Dumbledore would have to go around the ministry as they were unable to see the light and give into his demands and after he was done teaching his class he would have revenge on Potter.

Harry who knew Lockhart was a fraud had decided to skip the class along with Daphne but upon reading the mind of Ronald Weasley they had found out yet another attempt by Dumbledore to forse a love potion only this time Ginny had come along to claim her prize luckily for Harry who had the details he had polygenic potion as it was not hard to convince Ron to drink. Soon Ron looked just like Harry as she chased after him Ron was yelling at her to stop that he was Ron her brother not Harry soon he ran into Dumbledore who was relieving himself on a wall knocking him over as Ginny went to kiss the Harry disguised Ronald who jumped out of the way so instead she kissed Dumbledore's arse who immediately feinted. Harry and Daphne could not stop laughing.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

I don't own Harry Potter

Thanks for the reviews!

Harry and his friends enjoyed the first half of the year a lot and before long it was time to return home for the Christmas holidays. Harry would be going home for most of the time but would spend the rest of the holidays at Daphne's house. But all of them knew that Dumbledore was sure to try something before they left. They had conveniently neglected to tell Umbridge about their little problem with the muggle studies professor it was too much fun.

Meanwhile

Dumbledore was in deep concentration at the moment as he was taking a large dump outside of the Slytherin common room entrance, "That will teach them to demote me to teach a class about filthy muggles, I am the greatest wizard ever" "Talking to yourself are we Professor Dumbledore" said Harry as he came around the corridor. "Ah Harry just the man I wanted to see" said Dumbledore making a move to grab Harry's arm. "I don't care what you want I don't have you for class, and I heard everything you just said, some leader for the proper treatment of muggles you are. I know they can't fire you but your reputation would be soiled just like the floor there where you decided to crap" said Harry with a smirk. "Harry you are going dark you must marry Ginny and transfer to Gryffindor it is our only hope" said Dumbledore in a commanding voice. Just then Ronald Weasley came in holding the hand of none other than Argus Filch, Dumbledore gave them a puzzled look. "Oh yeah I know about the love potion in that kidney pie you sent me I rekeyed it to Argus and Ronald as they make a lovely couple as they complete each other one makes messes the other cleans them up" said Harry to a dumbstruck Dumbledore. Dumbledore made a move to try and grab Harry but Harry swerved and Dumbledore instead grabbed McGonagall's arse. "Albus how dare you" she screamed, Dumbledore fainted upon seeing another plan go so wrong and promptly landed in his pile of fecal matter. Filch and Ronald began making out and declared to the now shell shocked dungeon that they were engaged. Many people vomited much of it landing on the unfortunate Albus Dumbledore.

The train ride to London was uneventful for the friends but they would soon be away from the pressures of school and free to spend some time together. Harry and Draco would practice quiddich as the season had been pushed back to the final three weeks of school so people could focus more on school work rather than the intermural sport. Suddenly there was a crack and they were joined by Molly Weasley and Albus Dumbledore, the latter of which looking increasingly annoyed. Before they could do anything Fred and George who had been sitting in the background hit them over the head with a lamb leg they had been testing something with. They then shoved them in the bathroom where they would awake many hours later wondering how they ended up in a bathroom together.

It was good to be Harry Potter.

I


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

I don't own Harry Potter

Eventually Ron and Filch would break up as the potion began to wear off and both of them were horrified to think that they were actually in love at some point! Besides that the year became a cakewalk for Harry as he seemed to skate through the year. Harry eventually realized he had not spent a lot of time with his friends so for the month of January they would try something fun. Something fun was not hard to find as the snakes at Hogwarts showed them where the chamber of secrets was. Harry Draco and Daphne were joined by Tracy and Pansy. They were all informed about there being a basilisk down here and had taken the proper potion to counteract that. Harry then called out to the snake "Where are you bright scales" "Who is it" came the reply. The basilisk as Harry translated to the rest of them was named Kimmy and she had a playful nature. Soon the friends all jumped aboard Kimmy and put on an invisibility charm. Tonight they would have fun.

Draco, Pansy, and Tracy all nervously followed Harry and Daphne aboard Kimmy and soon they were off as invisible friends on a great adventure. Kimmy told them she wanted to kill muggleborns and the friends cheerfully pointed her in the direction of the Gryffindor Common room. Harry realized Kimmy being a basilisk would have a very difficult time navigating through a common room even if she was invisible. Harry luckily was able to shrink her to fit in his pocket. Slowly the friends approached the portrait of the fat lady. Daphne was the one to step forward. "Who are you"? asked the fat lady her eyes going scarlet upon seeing that a Slytherin was attempting to enter the common room. The portrait of the fat lady never said anything else as Daphne used Sectemsempra and the fat lady was shredded straight through the canvas. "I like abstract art better anyways" said Daphne with a shrug while Fred and George chuckled exited at the opportunity to mess with their old house. . Soon the group entered the still and quiet common room but before they could go any further a flash of red hair came pelting at Harry "Harry you finally realized your feelings for me and are ready to with professor Dumbledore lead the light" said Ginny Weasley as she attempted to kiss Harry but before he had time to react Daphne grabbed Ginny's wrist and with a healthy snap broke her wrist in two. Harry suddenly got an idea as he looked down at the ugly girl known as Ginny. Ginny was about to attack him before he screamed "Avada Kedavra" and Ginny dropped. "I now can create a horcrux" said Harry "I need to get a move on myself so I can create one but I will not under any circumstances kill Ronald as he is too much fun to have around" said Draco as all of the others nodded their heads in agreement and sought out their first kills. Daphne walked into the girls dormitory and finished off a muggleborn first year with a simple Avada Kedavra. Tracy Davis had decided in order to save muggleborns for Kimmy to eat she would stroll down to the library to look at a book on dark arts. She was lucky however as she saw Aberforth Dumbledore pacing the hallways no doubt spying for his brother. Carefully she snuck up on Aberforth before tapping him on the shoulder. As he turned around his face held a look of absolute and utter terror. "Avada Kedavra" screamed Tracy as Aberforth fell. Fred and George meanwhile with the help of a very special map of theirs discovered two more of Dumbledore's followers and quickly gave them the quick end. The only one left now who had yet to go was Draco and Pansy who were looking for the right ones. At last they finished off both Filch and Madam Pince who were in a broom cupboard. Then finally they unleashed Kimmy on the Gryffindor first year muggleborns who were surprisingly easy to signal out as they were all grouped together. She used her deadly vision before eating the first years to erase all evidence as the word going around that the chamber of secrets being open would cause some to feel a little mistrust around Slytherin and that would be detrimental to some of his plans. Besides he could carry Kimmie around with him while she was small. Kimmie also adjusted her vision to be non-lethal to any student of Slytherin house. Soon it was time to clean up before the whole castle woke up. To late they heard a sound of Ronald Weasley coming down the stairs. They quickly stunned him and modified his memory to reflect he had not seen or heard anything. As a joke they put a three day fart talk charm on him which caused every word to come out of his mouth to be a fart with smell included. They had with the help of Professor Snape transformed Ginny into an inferi that would spy on Dumbledore. Filch and Pince meanwhile Harry had prepared into a fanastic stew.

The next day

The whole school was in a flurry over the fact that six Gryffindor first years all muggleborns had gone missing. Soon it was concluded that Filch who was also missing had in anger over being a squib killed them as he felt it was his birthright to have magical abilities before killing himself and madam Pince. The ministry, which had discovered Lockhart was a fake and not qualified to teach DADA had decided not to reveal to the public his fallacies if he took the vacant librarian post in which he proudly proclaimed to his adoring fans was to help educate students on the dangers of certain books as he has had countless near death escapes with the wrong books! The ministry along with Headmistress Umbridge had reluctantly given the DADA post for the next year to Remus Lupin who had spied on Dumbledore for Harry. Oddly enough Dumbledore had also applied no doubt wanting to use it as a means to gain a little power and influence back with the students, but now he knew what it felt like just like Riddle and Snape to be qualified but rejected. Snape had made an agreement that he and Lupin would alternate the role of potions and DADA to get around the curse that was on the DADA post. The role of caretaker was harder to fill eventually they hired Maximus Large to teach muggle studies and moved Dumbledore into the role of caretaker. The contract of Dumbledore prevented him from being fired but also prevented him from resigning. Upon hearing this he was furious despite teaching a useless subject he was still a teacher and held power over his pupils. Now he was doing manual labour which was hard at his age and not good for the greatest wizard of all time to be doing. Only Hagrid and McGonagall vouched for him and eventually he was stuck as caretaker and immediately feinted.

Dumbledore had a meeting with Ginny tonight and it was regarding how to eventually secure Harry back. He had just taught his last class of Muggle Studies which was just final exams and had come up with a perfect way to give Potter a love potion on the Hogwarts Express. At last Ginny arrived. Dumbledore failed to notice Ginny had no color in her skin and her eyes were blank. As Dumbledore explained his plan he did not hear the eager response he normally did and became frustrated and punched her and only then did he realize she was an inferi. He then destroyed the enchantment on her body and alerted Molly who was upset that Ginny and Harry would never wed and give them money. That thought made Dumbledore weep also. He would have to take Potter in by force. Harry and his friends had just said goodbye to Kimmy who despite being offered to go home with them had decided to stay at Hogwarts when they heard a battle cry "Potter"! It was Dumbledore who slashed his wand and began dueling Harry. Harry had ordered his friends to get help as he did not want them hurt. Dumbledore may have had trouble adjusting to the Holly and Phoenix wand but he was still formidable and above a second year even Harry. In no time he had bound Harry in ropes but he had stopped to gloat at his victory when Harry broke free and sent a shave charm at him which he dodged soon he had disarmed Harry easily and bound him again when Ronald Weasley had come to cheer his idol on but every time he opened his mouth fart would come out. Soon Ronald was panicking and began talking at a rapid pace and the smell became quite overwhelming upon smelling this Dumbledore fainted and Harry broke free stunned Ronald and shaved Dumbledore's beard. He then transfigured Dumbledore's clothes into the Ronald McDonald uniform complete with face paint and red hair. Soon it was time to go. At the feast Slytherin won the house cup by over three thousand points and also the quiddich cup going 3-0 with a 1200-10 win over a Gryffindor team that had Neville Longbottom as their seeker and a barely eligible Ronald as their keeper. Next was a 210-200 victory over Hufflepuff who outscored Slytherin by 140 again only to have Harry catch the snitch. In the final they outlasted Ravenclaw in a battle of will 630-430 they were only fifty points up when Harry caught the snitch. Now it was time to relax! 


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

I don't own Harry Potter

Dumbledore had officially hit rock bottom. He had went from chairman of the ICW, Supreme Mugwump of the Wizangamot and headmaster of Hogwarts to the lowely role of caretaker. His contract prevented him from simply walking away and it was all Potter's fault. He knew Potter had something to do with the death of his loyal servant Ginny but could not prove it. He knew Harry was becoming darker than the darkest dark and here he was powerless to do anything to prevent it. He was deeply disturbed to find that the Dursley's were brutally murdered. Apparently Vernon had put them all in a food processor before killing himself. Dumbledore knew Potter was behind it no doubt eliminating yet another brilliant plan of his. Luckily he still had people on his side, at least he thought so. As he contemplated this he received the Daily Prophet and immediately fainted.

_Potter clears Grindlewald is Dumbledore a fake_

_By Rita Skeeter. _

_Gillert Grindlewald long considered the most feared dark wizard of all time until You-Know-Who supplanted him atop the dark wizard rankings was today given a pardon by the ministry and the ICW for his crimes against the wizarding world citing insanity. He claims he sought to take over power as revenge against Albus Dumbledore who he claims showered him in love potions. Eventually Grindlewald broke free and lost his sanity. When Dumbledore defeated him he was put up in Numengard where he claims Dumbledore came weekly to torment him as he had done in the past often inviting his boyfriend Alastor "mad eye" Moody to join him. Harry Potter who is no stranger to the manipulations of Dumbledore began studying this over the summer and found there was more to the story. While Dumbledore took out Grindlewald his heroics seem to have dimed for the fact that he created the monster. We attempted to reach out to Dumbledore who is now the caretaker at Hogwarts but the only response we received was "it was for the greater good"_

Dumbledore could not believe it was already September 1st but this meant a new chance to get to Potter. He had it all planed out he would assign Potter to detention with him and put him under the imperious curse! He was rudely interrupted however by Headmistress Umbridge "Caretaker Dumbledore I expect those floors moped today" she said in a commanding voice as if she was his superior. Without thinking he pointed his holly and phoenix wand which only unleashes about thirty percent of his magical core but still it was true as he shouted "Avada Kedavra" and Umbridge dropped to the floor. He then saw an opportunity to gain some power back and transformed her into an inferi. Next he used his new puppet to resign as headmistress. While he used some unforgivable he thought he might as well use more he then used the imperious on Fudge which caused the minister to give him his role as headmaster back. He thought about getting his other positions back but that would be a little suspicious. He was content with headmaster and the opportunity to get Harry back. The ministry student task forse would remain as Harry was part of it and it would give him a reason to collaborate with the headmaster. Dumbledore would kick out Harry's friends for academic dishonesty for how else would all of the Slytherins have such good grades. His masterplan was really taking flight as although Ginny was dead he could now as soon as Harry was back under his control forse Harry to marry Molly as she and Arthur had divorced. He was the smartest man in the world he thought. How wrong he was.

When Harry heard the news that Dumbledore had somehow gained power back he along with his friends had passed a bill as the student task forse to remove Dumbledore. Dumbledore obviously did not read the guidelines that state the task force votes on a member of the staff or wizarding community to take the position. Therefore on the train ride they passed by a vote of 9-0 to remove Dumbledore as he was not approved of in the first place. Next they voted on a new headmaster one who was not part of the staff to bring a fresh perspective they elected a Frenchman by the name of Pierre Bread whom they had met in the summer in Paris. He ran a small fifty student school on the France- Monaco border. As soon as Dumbledore found out he fainted woke up and fainted again six times total before it sunk in.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Dumbledore was officially pissed off. Potter dared oppose him he would pay. He thought of this as he moped up the third puddle of vomit this hour. He hated being caretaker, and to rub salt on the wounds Potter had convinced the minister to assign uniform for the caretaker and he was forced to wear a French maid outfit. It was completely ridicules but he would have his revenge he thought as he blew up another mop!

Harry and Daphne were walking down the hall when Dumbledore came probably to assign detention in which headmaster Bread would have to nullify again. Harry quickly avoided him and stepped into the great hall with Dumbledore who stepped atop the staff table and mooned the shocked students before urinating in Headmaster Bread's goblet. He then was about to assassinate Bread but he instead pulled out a feather duster. Bread attempted to stun him but dropped his wand when Dumbledore shoved his arse on his plate of eggs and left a present. He then took out his wand and attempted to summon Harry but instead somehow summoned Ronald Weasley who was devouring Filche's supply of cat treats. Harry then had an idea he applied a permanent sticking charm which latched the side of Ronald's face to Dumbledore's arse. "The light will rise" said Dumbledore as he shook his bottom in an attempt to get Ronald off who was licking his crack obviously enjoying the sticky substance of years without wiping brought, needless to say Dumbledore fainted.

Eventually Ronald would be removed it only cost him his cheek. His cheek would be replaced with a rhino buttock.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

I Don't own Harry Potter

Harry's Revenge

Harry and his friends were sick and tired of Dumbledore coming after them, it was annoying enough to drive one crazy. Ronald after having the side of his face replaced with a rhino buttock was now parading around the school as if he was a hero, even though everybody knew he and Dumbledore were cheek to cheek to say. Dumbledore do to his unique contract that prevented his termination had taken rebellion and was always flashing people and blowing up mops to the point that Faux his phoenix had left him. Dumbledore now had a turkey vulture by the name of Greasetrap. Dumbledore just the other had soaked his mop bucket full of love potions keyed to Molly Weasley and attempted to hit Harry over the head to have the potions sink in. However he had instead hit Ronald who was now being questioned by the ministry after discovering that he had gotten Molly pregnant. Harry decided enough was enough and he went to the paper.

Daily Prophet

Ministry Vacates Dumbledore's Order of Merlin

After rapid investigation it has been determined that because Albus Dumbledore had driven Grindlewald to be what he was he did not earn his Order of Merlin First Class. It was like rewarding someone for cleaning up their own mess. The order of Merlin council voted 9-0 to remove Dumbledore from the brotherhood. At the press conference when asked about how he felt Dumbledore the caretaker at Hogwarts immediately fainted to a shocked crowd.

Harry could not keep the grin off of his face as he saw Dumbledore in anger blow up six closets full of mops in his anger. Headmaster Bread had forbidden Dumbledore near Harry, so the aging caretaker had taken his anger out on the school, like using acid to clean the portrait of the fat lady and urinating on the sets of armor. Potter would pay was the only thought in his head.

Harry was walking down the halls of Hogwarts when he heard an odd noise it seemed to be coming from the janitors closet. It appeared to Dumbledore speaking to what looked to be a half dozen mops. "Now you mops listen here, tonight I plan to kill all of Potter's friends as Harry must come to the light" said Dumbledore to the completely stationary mops. After a while he looked at a particular mop and said "You dare question me Quincy how would you like to have use you to clean up the bathrooms all the bathrooms" thundered Dumbledore. Then he took out a black cloak and put it on another mop and said "Alas, it is Voldemort coming to me the only man he fears" said Dumbledore blowing up the mop. Then to Harry's dismay he saw a mop that he thought was supposed to look like him "Potter I gave you a chance" Dumbledore thundered until he saw Potter watching Dumbledore play with his mop collection. Harry immediately ran and soon put three floors between himself and Dumbledore. When Dumbledore realized that Potter had seen what he did he promptly fainted.


	26. Chapter 26

Harry had at last done it. He had as a seventh year finally helped his friends create Horcruxes but had also mimicked the elder wands effects on all of their wands. It took a lot out of them especially with Dumbledore standing constantly in their way. The aging caretaker had entered Harry in the triwizard cup in an attempt to lure Voldemort who Harry killed and destroyed his Horcruxes. In 5th year he tried to kidnap Harry to the hall of prophesies with a fake prophesy. And sixth year he attempted to teach Harry a lesson in respect as he called it but he was saved by Headmaster Bread.

Today Harry and his friends would end Dumbledore as his games had reached their limit. They all knew even with Elder wand properties that Dumbledore would be tough to beat using that useless Holly and Phoenix wand of his. They had all trained hard and now it was time to execute their plan.

The Borrow

Molly Weasley was furious! Potter and his friends had just burnt down her house. He then had the nerve to pull her hair and scalp her saying it was a long time coming. He would pay. She just had to find Dumbledore who was currently busy with Ronald as they had fallen in love.

The Day

Harry and his friends arrived back at Hogwarts to see caretaker Dumbledore standing outside holding a mop. "Back I see well tonight you little shites will learn what I have been through, Avada Kedavra" said Dumbledore pointing his mop at Draco who immediately died followed by Astoria. Dumbledore immediately removed all of his clothes before running down the halls proclaiming himself the king of the world. Harry and Daphne followed him as he ran into the room of requirement. Dumbledore was about to use his mop once again but Fred and George broke a coffee table over his head. Molly Weasley came in but Harry saw the moment and used the imperious curse on Ronald to make him eat Molly. He chased Molly into the hallway and you could hear ripping before Harry used the Avada Kedavra one more time. Dumbledore with one last battle cry said "Avada Kedavra" but Harry jumped out of the way and sent one of his own at Dumbledore who immediately crumpled.

15 years later

Harry and Daphne were married and named their two kids Draco and Astoria in honor of their fallen siblings. Dumbledore's body was mummified and used as a dart board in Knockturn Alley.

All was swell.


	27. Chapter 27

When Harry and Daphne were eighty years old they traveled to knockturn alley for some spell books when they heard a noise. Looking around they were alarmed to see Dumbledore in his mummified form. He had used an odd ritual to escape the underworld. "Ill swallow your soul" he said hauntingly. Harry ignored him. Dumbledore was pissed he was the defeater of Grindlewald and his body had been used as a dartboard in Knockturn alley. They would all pay! He began advancing on them until Harry who grew board blasted him to smitherines.

All was truly well! And Dumbledore went back to hell where he belonged


	28. Chapter 28

Miles and Mildred were two students who were constantly in trouble for sticking their noses where they did not belong. Although they lived in the year 2069 many years after the events of Dumbledore who was a distant decident of theirs they held loyalty for the man who had at one point been the greatest wizard who ever lived. They were constantly picked on at school for being related to the laughing stock of the wizarding world. These actions would result in drastic measures.

"Do you have the potion ready" Miles asked as he reread the enchantments,despite being third years they were very advanced and had an affinity for complicated spells. The potion was ready as Mildred brought the remains of Dumbledore's mummy which his family had salvaged from the street in Diagon Alley. At last they dumped the dried remains into the cauldron and waited as they read the enchantments which began working. After three hours the cauldron exploded revealing Dumbledore in his mummified state. He advanced on the boys menacingly "you saved me from the under world and I thank you but I need something more" "Anything my lord" they both squeled in fear. Dumbledore lifted them both my the shirts and sucked out their flesh leaving Dumbledore to look just as he had prior to death. "Silly boys you didn't read that resurrection and the gift of immortality required me to take your flesh but I am immortal" said Dumbledore as he kicked the dried out husks of his descendants. " I will one day make sure you two will have a statue in your honor" and with that Dumbledore left free to wreck havic again with the advantage of immortality. He was back and his first stop was Hogwarts.


	29. Chapter 29

Dumbledore thundred into the great Hall at Hogwarts. The hall had not changed in the slightest since his days. Dumbledore was enraged to find out he was erased off the official list of Hogwarts headmasters and there would be hell to pay. "Excuse me sir but who are you" asked the current headmaster Lonnie Rogers who had led the school for the past seventeen years. Dumbledore ignored them and began advancing meaningly toward the staff table. " if he wasn't dead is say he looked a lot like that corker Dumbledore " said a girl named Jackie Brown who was the great granddaughter of Lavender Brown. Slowly Dumbledore stood up in front of the great hall. Immediately Dumbledore using wandless magic killed the entire staff in front of the students "I am Dumbledore" he roared as he stood over the slain staff.

Within weeks Dumbledore had the entire wizarding world under his command only one person knew what to do.

Shelly Girard was an overweight middle age head of the department of mysteries and knew she had the key to defeat Dumbledore. Yesterday he had killed half the department because they tried inquiring how he came back to life worst of all he had used a mop as a wand. Currently he was using mops under charms to patrole the corridors for wrongdoers and to spy. But Shelly hid from them and at last found what she was looking for a chest of identical swords. Quickly she prepared the cauldron and cut off her hand and watched the return ofDraco, Astoria, Tracy, Fred, George, Daphne, Pancy, and Harry buy activating their Horcruxes. All the group had died old except Astoria and Draco but the group didn't resurrect them because they only had not found their Horcruxes. But over the years Girard had found them waiting for the day she would resurrect these heroes. Despite the fact that Astoria and Draco died young all of the group came back at age 11. They would go to Hogwarts and stop Dumbledore.


	30. Chapter 30

Albus Dumbledore was now offically minister of magic having killed the previous one and all of his associates. Dumbledore has appointed all of his mops to his positions as adviaors to keep his ministry workers under his thumb. He had just reappointed himself as Headmaster and had already researched who his new staff would be and bou would the world be in for a surprise.

Dumbledore had researched a highly illegal ritual from Africa that would give staff he needed. He had his sacrifices ready three unsightly muggle girls he snatched in the street. "Let us go" one squeled "Shut up bitch" Dumbledore snarled as he struck her across the face. His fire was ready and soon he threw them into the fire pit located in the spot where Hagrids hut of a house once stood. The flames turned bkue and green and Dumbledore belched in appreciation

Standing there were the revived Ronald, Ginny, and Molly Weasley the result of a ritual that brought the dead back to their previous condition in exchange for another life. Ron, Ginny, and Molly all had scalps and skin again. They would teach Charms which was Ginny's , Potions easily going to the queen of Love Potions, and Ron DADA despite being a novice. He would have to tell people Ron and Ginny had a disease that made them look to be school aged. Dumbledore and his three minions eagerly looked over the list of students to find if Harry Potter had descendants so they could claim the Potter fortune which was the first goal. Dumbledore was angered to such a degree that he blew up a mop when he saw Harry along with his friends on the incoming first year list. " This time you will die Potter" Dumbledore belched to the roaring lion that was the Weasley family. The Weasley matriarch Molly was looking forward to being the one to give life to the twins in their first life and taking them out in their second. Dumbledore chuckled as he and Ronald undressed and began making love. It appeared Molly and Ginny were already undressed and kissing passionately in the next bed. It was perfect Dumbledore sighed with a wink to Ronald.


	31. Chapter 31

Dumbledore and his new staff that included his three Weasleys and a collection of mops stood waiting to great the incoming first years. Dumbledore already had his new mop wand which was made out of elder wood ready to kill Harry if did not accept the light. Dumbledore had his mop at the ready as soon as Harry walked in but Harry disarmed himnwhile Dumbledore was making a show to lounge at then sent Dumbledore to the Dungens along with the unarmed Weasleys. But the good times would last before long Dumbledore had sent the ministry in to arrest Harry adnd his friends but they had taken refuge in the room of requirement. Dumbledore already had his mops on high alert.

While Dumbledore was waiting for a report from his mop lieutenant Soap he saw a strong looking seventh year boy. Dumbledore pounced on him and began making love in the hall way nobody could stop him he was the Minister of Magic. "Tomorrow I shall track Harry and claim the fortune" he said with a belch as peppered the screaming boy with wet kisses.


	32. Chapter 32

Molly Weasley had just finished a shift of having to look for Harry when she realized that it was time to teach her first Potions class. She would only be teaching cooking as Potions beside love Potions were beyond her ability. Dumbledore had changed the owls so that Potions would be a cooking class she loved that man almost as much as she loved her daughter and lover Ginerva. Speaking of Ginny she had learned that she had a balding potion put in her shampoo buy some first year prankster but Albus Dumbledore being the great man he was executed him and his family buy strangling them and blasting them with his mop/wand. Just then Ginny walked in and she engaged her in a passionate kiss and began making love needless to say class would be cancelled today.

Dumbledore meanwhile was dancing for joy because his house elf Belcher had located where Potter was hiding. The room of requirement did not provide food meaning they would have to come out soon. Dumbledore kept for joy and kissed Belcher on the mouth as they made hot sweet love for four hours.


	33. Chapter 33

Dumbledore was beginning to get frustrated. It had been three weeks yet the little shits had yet to leave the room of requirement. Dumbledore had resorted to blasting the wall in frustration. He went to go get Molly to cover for him on his way to her room he found her and Ginny making love in the hall way they were stark naked and passionately kissing. Dumbledore was jealous so he summoned Ronald who was teaching a class. The students cheered as their dim wites professor flew out of the room. While they made love Harry and his crew were able to sneak out and destroy Dumbledore 's mop collection.

Dumbledore was whistling merrily after his fun until he saw the smouldering remains of his faithful mop soldiers. "Curse you Potter I WILL avenge my mops they will not die in vain and I WILL have your vast fortune" Dumbledore belched madly into the night. Just then a first year girl from Hufflepuff approached the angered annoyed headmaster. "Professor I had a nightmare in class" she whimpered. Dumbledore punched her knocking her over "you shouldn't sleep in class you dumbass now you won't have to worry about nightmares Avada Kedavra" Dumbledore belched. " That takes care of that" Dumbledore humed pleasantly it appeared to be just what he needed to get him into a good mood.


	34. Chapter 34

Dumbledore gave a mad belch as he thundred down the hall towards the room of requirement. As he approached he found his way blocked as students were walking by as it was a busy hallway "Get the hell out of my way" he belched. Nobody seemed to hear him so without thinking he sent fiend fire at them killing all the nearby students and quickly spreading through the school. Most students including Harry and his friends managed to escape harm and fled. Dumbledore pushed some students out of the way to save himself as he headed for the apparation point. At last he stood on a hill and tookna leak as he watched Hogwarts quickly crumble and collapse.

Dumbledore as Minister of Magic led his own investigation and proclaimed that Harry and his friends would take the blame. He had threatened to kill the families of those claiming that Dumbledore had pushed students out of the way to save himself. He had decided to award himself the order of Merlin for bravery. After his speech in which he congratulated himself he vowed to track down Potter.

Dumbledore had walked confidently into Gringotts and demanded to seize Harry's account to rebuild Hogwarts. He received the shock of a lifetime. Apparently Harry had given all of his money away before he died in his first life. The gobkin stated that the ministry had a disaster relief program that had never been touched that would pay for Hogwarts school to be rebuilt. A million galleons is the cost to build a new castle and there were 8 million in the account.

After 5 weeks Dumbledore had tears of joy the rebuilding of Hogwarts had cost two thousand galleons. Which meant Dumbledore had given himself a bonous of seven million nine hundred and ninety eight thousand galleons. He had decided his bonous was worth it even though he destroyed the school. In an effort to save money the ground where the castle stood now had 5 trailers Dumbledore stole from a muggle scrapyard. The dormitories as he liked to call them were the only expence as they were just some cheap single person tents where four to eight people would be forced to try to cramp themselves in while sharing a blanket. Dumbledore had situated the Slytherin tents in the hollow that contained the giant spider colony that Hagrid established. This was all working out perfectly and soon in a matter of two mere weeks the students would return and Harry Potter would pay as he would go back thinking because Dumbledore himself had sent him a letter of forgiveness that he was safe. Dumbledore apparated home to take a duml but his grin never left.


	35. Chapter 35

As Harry and his friends finally got off the train to re start their Hogwarts careers they made a pact to stay away from Dumbledore. The once proud school was gone and on its grounds sat cheap and ugly trailers all stolen from mobile home parks by Dumbledore they would send him back to hell where he belonged.

Dumbledore meanwhile was belching excitedly as he thought of all the money he was going to get for tuition. He and Ronald had been making love like a pack of wildebeests in his office for six hours. Dumbledore soon saw the crowd of students approaching the entrance to the trailer park known as Hogwarts. "Students and Potter and fresh men" Dumbledore belched as he eyed a seventh year Hufflepuff with his beady eyes as he patted his great tweed stomach making a note to make love to him later. Dumbledore gave a war belch as he saw Potter and his friends and began blasting students out of the way with his wand Harry was able to disappear not before destroying Dumbledore's trailer which had his collection of greasy cloaks in it and Ronald. Dumbledore hurried up and found a scalded and disfigured Ronald, Ginerva, and Molly. They were all red and hairless and because the spell was Potter's invention they would remain this unsightly way for the foreseeable future. Dumbldore belched in anger and began making love to some Hufflepuff boys.

Dumbledore belched in happiness after his love making when he received a sharp pain in his dick it was Potter with his wand out and he had given him wizard pocks, a wizards STD that made it feel as if the cruciatus curse was being performed on your dick every time you had sex there was no cure. It also didn't help Dumbledore had almost all the other muggle STD's. "Damn you Potter" he belched. In the meantime until he could come up with a solution he would kill instead of make love. "Blame Potter he made me this way" he belched as he killed sixty studens in one twirl of his mop/wand.


	36. Chapter 36

Dumbledore gave a powerful belch to show his immence anger at losing the most important thing in his life his ability to make love. Dumbledore was currently busy trying to con some mudbloods into paying five times more tuition. Dumbledore loved suckering people out of money and with it he would solve his problem. Dumbledore found a sharp stone and cut his penis clean off before vacuum packing it and putting it in storage. He then went to the jewellery store and "paid" which meant stole thousands upon thousands of diamonds Dumbledore belched in amusement when he realized he was obsessed with stealing money but never spent it always preferring to steal stuff. Dumbledore dumped the diamonds into the toilet he was using to make the position belching in fright when it suddenly sizzled.

Soon the diamonds were liquid and formed into Dumbledores new penis.

Dumbledore soon realized he killed all his boyfriends when he with his new diamond tool and soon the death count climbed. Dumbledore felt powerful. Dumbledore then went to the ministry in his favorite suit which was his birthday suit and began attacking new employees making love killing and then stealing their money. This gave Dumbledores ego a boost and also an idea.

The next day Diagon Alley was in turmoil Dumbledore had stolen all the gold at Gringotts killing all the Goblins as he hearlessley blew the building up. "All right you animals by now you weelize that I am the weeder of wouild and if you want money make love to me the more you do the wealthier you become" Dumbledore belched. The witches automatically stepped forward prepared to have to make love to him before they were blasted back. "I wouldn't let you bitches touch me I want men" Dumbledore belched madly as he eyed a gentleman's package with a face full of greed. One man tried to make a break for hit but Dumbledore tackled him giggling/belching as he did so as he pulled his pants down and gave him a blowjob since his diamond dick would kill him Dumbledore then threw some coins at him. Dumbledore decided only his enemies would he ass fuck and that is how be planned to kill Harry with. As more men were forced forward Dumbledore did a little jig dance hooting and clicking as he did so. "Welcome to the new age"Dumbledore belched as he consumed eighteen manhood at once.

Dumbledore had a great day and decided to sit down and shoot up some drugs and get drunk on firewisky when his door was blasted face was blasted off by this hooded figure " well Severus has decided to come back and join us in the future" a bloody Dumbledore belched madly as he blacked out. Snape ignored him and managed to contact Harry to tell him that he had captured the old coot whose execution would be tonight.


	37. Chapter 37

Harry arrived and found Dumbledore chained up on the floor in front of Snape begging to be released. Dumbledore no longer had a face after Snape had blasted it off. Harry's moment had come at last he pointed his wand at Dumbledore who was now passing gas at a tremendous rate and said the words "Avada Kedavra" and Dumbledore simply laughed. Dumbledore then blasted the chains that he was bound in and said "fool I am imortal I just waited for you to be summoned by Snape" Dumbledore belched evilly as he pulled out his diamond dick. "Prepare to meet the light you little shit" Dumbledore belched madly. But as Dumbledore charged at Harry he was blasted back and crumpled in a heap by Snape. "Him and his theatrics" Snape said in a bored voice. Dumbledore woke up three days later in a dumpster in Scotland alone and without a face. Dumbledore decided to fetch a face he appeared to the ministry and found the great granddaughter of Dolores Umbridge who looked just like her after killing her Dumbledore took out his diamond dick and skinned her face. Dumbledore belched in appreciation as he pealed the face off and slaped it on his face. Now he would have fun. Everyone avoided him as he left wearing his new face.


	38. Chapter 38

Dumbledore came screaching to a halt. He was making love to his boyfriend elphais Doge but now Snape had tracked him down. Dumbledore took out his diamond dick and shot crystalized seamon at him and was about to escape when Hagrid bashed his head with two trashcan lids. Hagrid then shoves him in the coal stove. Dumbledore was burning and belching with rage at what he believes was a betrayal of the worst kind.

Dumbledore was gone except for a hunk of scalded flesh with no limbs. Luckily Dodge managed to save him and took him to their love shack lab as they liked to call it. Soon Dumbledore was put in a rainbow colored Darth Vader life support suit with a powerful dick. He thanked Doge by making love to him and then blew up the house after Dodge wanted to go get something to eat. "Love isn't over until I say" he belched robotically as he smashes Dodges head with a crowbar.


	39. Chapter 39

Dumbledore was in his office admiring his new life support suit as he posed in the mirror flexing his arms. His powerful dick was in need of some use so Dumbledore hopped into the air and summoned Amos Diggory whom was now an old man. "Well hello cuty" Dumbledore belched robotically as he ripped his clothing off and flipped the screaming Diggory over for some finger licking good times. " "Oh it was a day away father what have you done for ME" Dumbledore sang robotically into the night. "At least this time I didn't get mutherfucked" said Diggorys wife Shelly as she came in to kill Dumbledore. Dumbledore fled after recking her kitchen on the way out and returned to his office to smoke pot which wasn't advisable for someone in a life support suit. Just then his boyfriend Kreacher came in and Dumbledore sized him up "A ggod day for the light afterall" he belched. Tommorow would be a new day he vowed after stripping off Kreacher's clothes and consuming his man hood before plugging himself into the ancient elf.

A/N I may not update that frequently as my wife passed away but she wanted this chapter published so this is for her.


	40. Chapter 40

Dumbledore was in his office making love to Kreacher when there was a crash it was Snape and Hagrid. " come on sing with me " Dumbledore belched robaticaly. "I'll get us started a little bit of chicken Fry" Dumbledore began singing. But Hagrid took a swing at him. Dumbledore pulled out his wand and shot a high powered tickle charm at Snape and his penis patronus at Hagrid who covered his hind quarters just in time. "You'll pay for that one lumos" Dumbledore hissed as he sent a light in Hagrids face. Hagrid decided to take it opon himself to do what needed to be done and kicked coot Dumbledore in the balls. "Ooohhhhhh" Dumbledore moaned and belched as his head flew off like a high powered cork before landing back on his neck. "What the hell" Snape yelled as he grabbed his backpack and loaded it with Dumbledore possessions. Soon he escaped but Dumbledore had sent his army of robots that looked like the old headmaster before he was encased in his suit.

Snape had made it to the edge of the cave about a quarter mile was the apparation point but he was surrounded by Dumbledores robots just then Hagrid lept down and punched them all out. "Man I thought I lost you back there" Snape yelled. Hagrid was about to respond when an army of over a thousand robots began chasing them. Hagrid shot a few with his crossbow. " there's to many and the apparation point is to far away" Snape yelled hopelessly. "I'm down to my last" Hagrid said pointing at his now empty arrow holster. Snape had to make a tough decision "I'm sorry" he said sadly as Hagrid looked on confused. "Sectemsempra" he cried into the night as he severed Hagrids leg. Hagrid moaned on the ground but he was determined to take Snape down with him. As Hagrid faught Snape and pulled his hair Snape screamed "get off me the fuck off me" as he whipped Hagrid with his crossbow battering his face and knocking his teeth out. "You greasy haired traitor" Hagrid screamed as Snape took Hagrids bag of stolen Dumbledore items for himself. Snape began power walking as he couldn't run after injuring himself in his fight with Hagrid. Snape looked over his shoulder to see the robotic Dumbledores pile on Hagrid and rip hid clothes off. Hagrid let out a powerful scream as one consumed his manhood "ahhhhhhhhh ahhhhhh'" Hagrid screamed. Snape lit a cigarette and took off on Hagrids motorcycle because it would look suspicious if he apparated to head quarters and left Hagrid.

Outside Grimmald place Snapes girlfriend gave him a hug while Professor Binns who lived there looked around for Hagrid. "Hagrid?" he asked. When Snape didn't answer he said sadly and firmly "we tell madame Maxine nothing.. Not yet she is healing Harry who is sick I need her" Snape decided to keep a low profile and apparated upstairs.

I'm the bathroom he flexed his muscles and decided to shave his famous greasy hair off to hide the damage from where Hagrid pulled his hair. After shaving he went down stairs and was meet with a suspicious glare from the old man Arthur Weasley who was recently revived by Harry. Snape laughed in his face as he and his girlfriend went out for a ride on Hagrids motorcycle.


	41. Chapter 41

It was a somber afternoon as Harry, Professor Binns, Arthur, Madam Maxime, and Snape went outside to have a memorial service for Hagrid.

"Hagrid died just as he lived in grace" said Binns as he addressed the somber crowd. Madam Maxime was crying into Arthurs shoulder. "Severus would you like to say a few words" asked Binns. "No I'm not really good at this I have a potion to brew" Snape sneered. "Please you shared his final moments, I want to know his death had meaning" Madam Maxime moaned. Snape raised his eyebrow "Okay but his death did not have meaning, we were almost done and we were almost to the apparition point are wands weren't working Hagrid said "We got to steal some more" I said no well get caught. He stole my backpack and shoved me down kicking me in the groin. Then I looked back and…" said Snape as he let his words sink in. Arthur Weasley glared daggers at him.

"Truth is if it wasn't for Hagrid selfishness he would still be alive" said Snape as he blew up Hagrid's memorial stone.

That afternoon Snape was outside fixing up his new broom when he was approached by Arthur Weasley. "I see you got yourself a new shiny broom, great for getting as far as hell from here" Arthur said trying to intimidate the amused Snape. "What is this about Fleur" Snape asked. He knew Arthur was jealous of Snape's girlfriend Fleur. "Besides I keep your ass safe Weasley I stick out my neck for this group" Snape said in an oily voice. "Yeah and Hagrid's, you were pretty vague about that night" said Arthur in a brave voice. "Hey man Hagrid died a coward" Snape sneered. "So I've heard" Arthur countered. Snape sneered again before hunching away.

The next morning

Snape was about to go gather supplies when he saw Arthur glaring at him. Snape gave an amused grin. "Something you want to say Arthur" asked Snape as Arthur glared. "What the hell do you do for this group anyways,hmm, Mr. Moral Authority, you fix up an old muggle camper", Snape said as he turned back and jumped on his broom with Fleur. "If I ever need a radiator hose I'll give you a call" Snape mocked before taking off.

Later than night.

Snape banished the ghost of Binns to the underworld with a dark ritual. Now he was after Madame Maxime. She had snuck up on him and began fighting him. Just as Snape was about to choke her out Maxime shoved a broken piece of glass in his eye. Madam Maxime was doing a victory dance when she was struck down by Harry. Fleur then began attending to Snape's injuries. Snape would lose his eye and wear an eye patch. Arthur Weasley fled to join Dumbledore.


	42. Chapter 42

Arthur Weasley was fixing up Hagrids old motorcycle when he heard the breathing of Dumbledore's suit and low and behold it was the former headmaster he had broken the wards and jumped three stories onto the roof of the house. Then with a meanicing belch crashed through the roof. Snape managed to get everybody out and Harry hid them from Dumbledore in a secure location. Dumbledore pulled out his diamond dick and shot at Snape. Soon Harry returned and castrated the beast. Dumbledore retaliated with a furious belch. Before leaving he cut off Arthur's dick to take for his own leaving Arthur to die. "Sorry brother" Harry said as he killed Arthur out of mercy.


	43. Chapter 43

Dumbledore was furiously belching in his life support suit with rabid glee as he thought of the attack he had planned. "Today I shall rule the world" he belched before settling down with Kreacher. Dumbledore belched with glee as he took off his mask and began making out with Kreacher.

At the hideout there was a crash. As Snape and Harry went to go see the disturbance it was Hagrid whom was dressed as Dumbledore in a purple cloak that dripped with grease. His face was covered in makeup and he wore short shorts. Hagrid started trying to stab Snape with his small knife. Soon they were joined by Dumbledore who blew up the house killing Madam Maxime's sister and boyfriend Omar. Dumbledore belched at his handiwork hen he heard thunder and rain. Dumbledore summoned his pet Hagrid to go because the suit would short circuit in the rain but Dumbledore tripped on his shoelace and fell into a pond. Harry and Snape watched as Dumbledore was electrocuted the belches of pain lasted until Hagrid grabbed his master and apparated away. Kreacher belched in despair at Dumbledore. His suit was gone. He had no limbs. He could breath now that he stole a scuba tank he would have revenge. Dumbledore looked out the window and recognized some Hufflepuffs whom used to be students. He summoned the men and had some fun. "Not bad" he belched powerfully.

Dumbledore continued his quest for power but first he needed love. Just then Kreacher whom had staged a rebellion punched Dumbledore in the mouth knocking half his teeth out. As Dumbledore collapsed in a smocking heap Kreacher stole his wand. But the moment he took his eyes off the old coot Dumbledore sprang into the air and castrated him and put him into the freezer for later if he learned his lesson Dumbledore thought with an amused belch. Just then the doorbell rang it was his new house elf and boyfriend he met yesterday. "What up" Duncan the elf belched along with Dumbledore as they made love for 17 hours before going out to belched in happiness

.


	44. Chapter 44

Dumbledore and Duncan the house elf jumped on the saddle installed on Hagrids back as they took off for Diagon Alley. Soon the lovebirds were belching in happiness as they began making out. The path to Diagon Alley was blocked by Hannah Abbott. Dumbledore belched in anger. "Get out you puff before I blast you like a bug out of the sky" said Dumbledore as he gave an authoritative belch. As they were dueling Dumbledore gave a furious belch as she was too strong. Duncan and Hagrid had left him and we're making out in the corner belching in happiness. Soon Dumbledore was blasted into the wall collapsing in a crumpled heap. Soon he was up again but easily disarmed. Dumbledore took off he needed to find a way to beat Abbott before he could take out Potter or Snape. He made one last run for the door but this time it cost him as half his head was blasted off. Dumbledore took off like a bat out of hell.

Dumbledore gave a miserable belch as he thought of Hagrids and Duncan's betrayel he gave a last super belch as he made love to his new house elf Lee.


	45. Chapter 45

Dumbledore fingured lee when he heard a bang it was Hagrid with a knife. "This means all out war" Hagrid belched as he kissed Duncan the house elf. Dumbledore gave off a confident belch as he apparated away.

Later Dumbledore was auditioning a new houself named Lynch and had him fight his backup elf Art to the death to earn a roster spot. After Lynchs victory hagrid cracked Arts head open and scrabled his brains and made toast. Lee and Dumbledore were arrogantly belching as they fed eachother scrambled brains on toast when they heard a crash and it was Hagrid with a machete. Dumbledore jumled out of the way and gave Lee a blowjob before dueling Hagrid and soon Dumbledore was put in a sack while Hagrid put down the elves and ate them with a sickening crunch of bones. Hagrid was taking Dumbledore somewhere special.

So what did you do Hagrid the crowd yelled. "I threw him in the pit" he roared to thunderus applause as he with a delighted houself named Jason.


	46. Chapter 46

Jason the houself belched in delight as he thought of his sex life with Dumbledore. As he bent over the pitt Dumbledore was prisoned in to take a dump he let out a belch of pain as Dumbledore jumped up and bit is balls clean off. Dumbledore then hopped out and smashed the elf into the pit. "NOW I THROW YOU INTO PIT" Dumbledore belched in satisfaction as he ate the dock of the elf.

Dumbledore found a new elf named Ollie to make love to and he had a mission it was an albus on a mission.

Meanwhile Hagrid was relaxing in his condo he bought "ahh thanks for this condo a place i can escape that bastard Dumbledore " Hagrid belched as he madeout with his houself. Just then Dumbledore burst in but was blasted back my the bodyguard whom was Slughorn who was Hagrids fiance. Hagrid shered off Dumbledores dick and caused him to retreat in belching tears. Hagrid began to make out with Slughorn only to open his eyes and see Dumbledore in his place "suprise muthertrucker" he belched.

Will Hagrid survive find out next time


End file.
